Marriage - No longer a placeholder.

[Rich B]

I can't wait for your pussy to croak Jobson. I'm going to go to lunch on that.

You're going to eat Jobbos pussy?

That escalated quickly.

[mik]

I remember as a 20yr old my mate appearing one night with two big scratches down his face.

Apparently he had suggested to his then GF that (whilst he was also upset by the images she was showing him) he'd rather give money to a UK childrens charity than a Spanish save-teh-starving-donkeys foundation.

[Jobbo]

I can't wait for your pussy to croak Jobson. I'm going to go to lunch on that.

You're going to eat Jobbos pussy?

That escalated quickly.

Not at all what I was expecting

Anyway, he died last June and was cremated, so you'd probably have to snort him rather than eat him.

[evostick]

I can't wait for your pussy to croak Jobson. I'm going to go to lunch on that.

You're going to eat Jobbos pussy?

That escalated quickly.

Not at all what I was expecting

Anyway, he died last June and was cremated, so you'd probably have to snort him rather than eat him.

I know that. I liked the look of that one (Jasper wasn't it?). I'm on about the gay little kittens you have now.

[Jobbo]

The biggest of the three kittens is nails. He's baiting the dogs; it's quite hilarious.

I hope Jimmy doesn't mind that we've taken his thread off down this direction. Probably a good idea to be distracted.

[evostick]

The biggest of the three kittens is nails. He's baiting the dogs; it's quite hilarious.

I hope Jimmy doesn't mind that we've taken his thread off down this direction. Probably a good idea to be distracted.

The poor bastard probably doesn't even know what day it is anyway.

You know it's bad when a conversation about dying/dead pets lightens the mood.

[Broccers]

I can't wait for your pussy to croak Jobson. I'm going to go to lunch on that.

He's a nasty man.

Anyway back on topic for one minute. Thinking back from weird posts years ago from said mental woman here, Jim maybe it isn't you at all fella.

[Broccers]

The biggest of the three kittens is nails. He's baiting the dogs; it's quite hilarious.

I hope Jimmy doesn't mind that we've taken his thread off down this direction. Probably a good idea to be distracted.

The poor bastard probably doesn't even know what day it is anyway.

You know it's bad when a conversation about dying/dead pets lightens the mood.

As this didn't move on. Was in the pub with a woman talking about buying memories and rings etc. Said her late husbands ashes was contained in a ring on her wedding finger. Asking if he was a midget didn't go that well.

[V8Granite]

Well as bad as things get, being alone does give you chance to concentrate on masterbation.

My friend split up with his wife of many years last year. Now has a baby on the way but his Mustang engine blew up, so ying and yang.

So, using this wise and meaningful logic, you probably have some great wanks ahead.

Every cloud etc

Dave!

[240PP]

It’s all going to be fine

[Simon]

A girl I used to work with was into horses. Had 4 of the fuckers. Also had a new BMW X6. Also lived at home. She used to pay a lot for stables for her horses, and as a consequences of her lifestyle choices often didn't have any money at the end of the month to put petrol in her stupid car.

She moved out of home a few years back and her and her bloke bought a newly converted barn that also just happened to have a couple of fields and stables for her horses. In Surrey. It cost 3 quarters of a million, and she and her bloke were going 50/50 on it.

When I asked a mutual friend how much she had to fellate her bank manager in order to get the mortgage, I was told that the mortgage and associated housing costs were actually costing less than her stable fees for her horses, that she was obviously no longer having to pay, so she was quids in. My gob was smacked.

tl:dr, horses are expensive.

[JLv3.0]

Asking if he was a midget didn't go that well.

You literally are the actual Anti-Christ, aren't you

PS bravo, as that's exactly what I would have asked.

[Jobbo]

Well as bad as things get, being alone does give you chance to concentrate on masterbation.

My friend split up with his wife of many years last year. Now has a baby on the way but his Mustang engine blew up, so ying and yang.

So, using this wise and meaningful logic, you probably have some great wanks ahead.

Every cloud etc

Dave!

Masturbation leads to having a baby? Christ, I'm glad I've always used protection.

[evostick]

Masturbation leads to having a baby? Christ, I'm glad I've always used protection.

Fuck me I've been lucky over the years

Only posh wanks for me from now on.

[JLv3.0]

I must have fathered entire continents by now!

[PreacherCain]

I must have fathered entire continents by now!

Entire cuntries, certainly.

@Jimmy - really sorry to hear this; esp if there's a mental health dimension from your side too, I'm well aware of how these things can snowball. I hope things work out, or if they don't, that they fail safe.

[JonMad]

Damn, Jimmy. So sorry to read this.

[Foz]

Women, eh?

Gents, never try to understand women, women understand women, and that is why they hate each other!

[JLv3.0]

'Never try to work out how they think. They don't do it that often.'

[Gavin]

Sorry to hear that fella. Here can be a good place to vent. Possibly less like Mumsnet when this thread goes from sad news to eating hairy dad pussy and killing horses to glue the very fabric of society back together. Oh and wishing kittens to death, I am no fan of the feline but have never actually wished one dead afaik.

Keep your mind healthy if you can. x