Local politics

[Orange Cola]

We’ve got a building site in our village, the builders have destroyed a circular road by driving trucks on it, one half of the road they do have permission to use and the other they don’t. It’s a tight road network so the builders have set up a “one way” access system so they don’t get their trucks stuck passing each other hence why they’re using the whole of the circular road and not just the one half they’re permitted to use.

The other part of the problem is the builders are driving the trucks fully loaded down the part they shouldn’t use and exiting on the part they should use with empty trucks, therefore the half they shouldn’t be using is considerably worse than the other half.

Local parish council page posted up the full email notification of resurfacing works including the email address of who sent it from the council, I queried if the resurface was the whole road or just half of it. No one knew, so they decided that they should get everyone together at the next parish council meeting, word the questions, nominate someone to respond to the council, issue the draft wording for approval then send the response. By which point in time, due to when the PC holds their monthly meetings, the road resurface will have been completed

So I took the email address from the original Facebook post, sent a kind email back to the council and got a full response within 48 hours, 24 of those was the person being out on holiday. Council are now looking at resurfacing the whole lot in two phases, the first phase will go ahead as planned and on time, the second phase will happen once they’ve recovered costs from the builder.

I’m tempted to post the email reply on the same FB page to save them all the hours of work they’ve got planned.

It’s not f*cking hard, is it?

[DeskJockey]

You've just singlehandedly deprived several retired middle managers of a year's worth of purpose. Are you proud of yourself?

[Orange Cola]

Abso-fucking-lutely

[Nefarious]

Had similar with our residents association a few years back.

Our common lighting used to be the council's responsibility, and whilst strictly functioning, it was looking pretty tired - light covers old and heavily yellowed etc - to the point where the overall lighting was pretty dingy. We had three hour-plus meetings about resolving it, but the highly-abrasive south afrian chap who used to chair the RA insisted that the council absolutely wouldn't budge on replacements. In the end, I got sick of it and said I'd go ahead and replace the lenses myself at a cost of c.£80 - which Mr. chair insisted would not be covered by communal funded. I said "fine", I'll not only do it myself, but also cover all the cost personally. He still wasn't happy, but couldn't present any valid reason why.

Next thing, I get a phone call from somebody in the council, saying you can't interfere with council property. How would they know what I was planning, or have my phone number? That's right, Mr. South African had called them to grass me up. Grass me up for single-handedly fixing our problem at zero cost to anyone else

The amusing end to the story was that I then put in one five minute phonecall to somebody in the council stair lighting department, who said, "yeah, sure, we'll be down tomorrow", and it was all sorted without me having to lift a finger or spend a penny.

[NotoriousREV]

Some people want to be in charge, some want to get things done. Sometimes those two things overlap but not as often as you’d hope.

[Swervin_Mervin]

It keeps the old duffers out of trouble* so leave 'em be. Isn't Yu a Parish councillor or did I imagine that?

*mostly.

[duncs500]

My mum's chair of the parish council. It's great for her as it gives her a purpose in retirement, she's definitely in the school of wanting to get things done for the good of the community. When she got elected chair it w all got a bit controversial though as the previous self serving arsehole of a chair got very upset.

[Mito Man]

I don’t understand the purpose of our local parish council. I keep reading their minutes and agenda every month but it’s stupid shit like an hour discussion over repairing a concrete bollard or cutting an overgrown hedge. You could usually fix 99% of the issues in less time than it takes them to discuss it

There was actually one which started in November regarding some lady who needed her hedge cutting back, then the December minutes said she replied and booked it to be cut back in January. Then February minutes said that they sent a clerk to check it had been carried out.

Oh yeah there’s the yearly campaign to reduce the speed limit to 20. It really is a bunch of people with too much time on their hands.

[Swervin_Mervin]

I don’t understand the purpose of local parish councils.

FTFY

[Mito Man]

Actually it’s the other way round when I’ve dealt with them. They don’t know the limit of their own powers. Try and enforce things they can’t. It’s like dealing with clowns.

[Nefarious]

I have found the solution to these problems - a coup

Buy half the properties eligible to be part of the relevant organisation, and replace the pseudo-democratic association with a benevolent dictatorship

Nowadays, when stuff needs fixed, I just do it and everyone else gets a bill. No consultation, no comeback.

[dinny_g]

who needed her hedge cutting back

Seriously???

I’ll cut my fucking hedge when I’m good and ready and if you don’t like it, well, go fuck yourself...

[Swervin_Mervin]

who needed her hedge cutting back

Seriously???

I’ll cut my fucking hedge when I’m good and ready and if you don’t like it, well, go fuck yourself...

Until highways do it for you and send you the bill...

[NotoriousREV]

who needed her hedge cutting back

Seriously???

I’ll cut my fucking hedge when I’m good and ready and if you don’t like it, well, go fuck yourself...

Until highways do it for you and send you the bill...

At my old house, one of my boundaries was a public footpath that I never saw anyone use. Someone still complained to the council when my clematis went a bit wild and the council threatened to do it at my cost. I thought about letting them...

[dinny_g]

Wozers...

Thankfully my hedge is is not near the road so it would only be busybodies complainers.

The hedge us overgrown but it’s half covering a Volvo V40 (yep, that one. Still not got rid of it ) do I’m sure they don’t mind.

We don’t live there now anyway as we’re doing that place up to sell

[Beany]

This sort of curtain twitching fuckwittery is why I sometimes think 'it'd be nice to have £30k for a deposit on a mortgage' and then realise, actually, fuck being tied down and having to live around these sort of blithering thundercunts.

"Ooh, your hedge is a bit overgrown"
"Ooh, that car hasn't moved for a while"

Kinda makes a mockery of 'an englishman and his castle' really, doesn't it? An Englishman and his shitty fucking neighbours who sitck their noses in, in case their property values are affected because that's all they live for, more like.

[Orange Cola]

We get all of the above including months of the following:

1) Some youths were witnessed dropping glass on the road, it needs cleaning up and reporting. Request a quote and word with the local PCSO to step up patrols

2) Someone sweeps up the glass, usually before the first meeting

2b) PCSO not available, such and such went out to quote but couldn’t find any glass, can we please reconfirm exact location with the person who raised the issue?

3) PCSO agreed to step up patrols and report back. Joe Bloggs has agreed to show such and such where the glass is.

4) PCSO nothing to report, will step down patrols. Joe Bloggs took such and such to site, no glass found (after 4 months), PC to monitor situation.

Or, go to pub, mention glass in the road, find out who cleared it up and the people who witnessed it. Realise it was the usual suspect shit of a woman who’s off spring never does anything wrong. Everyone agrees they hate them and get on with their lives.

[Orange Cola]

Double post

[Orange Cola]

I’ve also been told to post up the council reply to the original issue on the local PC FB page just before the next meeting, which is almost hours before the road works start

[Mito Man]

I like that whenever there’s a planning application they completely lose it, even start knocking on your door or asking questions if you’re outside. Fortunately the local authority is really quite relaxed so most things go through within reason.