Been a shitty week

[ShockDiamonds]

Not really sure I need to post this which sounds daft. But maybe I do in order to aid the process. Father passed away earlier this week, not sure of the cause at this point, doctors are still trying to understand whether it was a heart attack or stroke. He was behind the wheel at the time but thankfully only slow speed and the car’s progress was arrested by a lorry. Nobody else injured or anything which is a blessing I guess.

I seem to be coping ok, which I’ve surprised myself with. Suppose I have more of his “life goes on boy” bullish mentality than I thought I did. Family and friends are being fab and we’re all supporting my mother who seems ok but had a bit of a wobble last night. Will continue to watch her.

Anyway, in the belief that ‘talking’ about this stuff with others will help, posting this. One day at a time I guess. Hardest thing I’ve ever done.

[duncs500]

Condolences Mark. Thankfully not experienced enough to offer much advice, but keep going, time heals most things.

[Nefarious]

That is a truly shitty thing. I lost my mum in a car accident in the Pyrenees in 2010, and posted on here from the foyer of some hotel in the middle of nowhere, and found it somewhat cathartic.

Words are always inadequate at times like these, and there is little consolation that can be offered, but know that others understand the sense of loss, injustice, and disbelief you must feel. Also, know that there will be a time in the future when the all-consuming sense of grief will become tolerable.

One of my little mantras - some things just can't be fixed, but you can use the pieces to make something new.

[ShockDiamonds]

Cheers guys. Yes the cathartic process I guess is what I’m thinking about. No matter how ok I may think I’m handling it, need to not bottle it up if that makes sense.

[Simon]

Crikey Mark, that's sad. Condolences to you and your's.

[speedingfine]

All the best Mark, sorry to hear that. Nef's mantra puts it very well.

[ZedLeg]

need to not bottle it up if that makes sense.

That’s the thing to try and keep in mind. My mum died when I was quite young and I didn’t deal with it at all for a long time. Caused me problems in other areas of my life through most of my twenties.

Condolences for your loss

[ilmostro]

Condolences - all the best.

[John]

Condolences. You'll obviously be very busy over the next week or two so don't forget to occasionally step back and take a breather.

[Gavin]

Wow, that is bloody rubbish. Condolences. I would echo the above advice I think. Time will help but in this case there was no slow degradation or illness to prepare you.

[David_Yu]

Condolences Mark. I often think dying suddenly and unexpectedly is more merciful than, say, after a long protracted, painful and hopeless illness, but it does rob one of that crucial element of being able to say goodbye.
Thankfully nobody else got hurt, as you said.

[DeskJockey]

Very sorry to hear that. I lost my mum four years and a week ago. In my experience it takes time for it all to surface. You'll grieve in your own way, so the only advice I'll offer is to make sure you make time for yourself. Don't load yourself up with every possible task and job.

[NotoriousREV]

Sorry to hear this, Mark. Grief can be a funny old thing. The main thing is to look after for yourself.

[Orange Cola]

Very sorry to hear about your dad, condolences.

We lost a family member earlier in the year, it took a month to get to the funeral so everyone was "ready" to go through with it by that point. It helped a lot that we very much made it a celebration of their life and spoke about their achievements and funniest moments. It sonics daft, but it made the grieving process a lot easier for everyone. Remember to take time for yourself.

[Mito Man]

Condolences Mark, take care of yourself.

[Marv]

Sorry to hear that Mark, condolences to you and your family.

[dinny_g]

Really sorry to hear Mark.

[JLv3.0]

Horrible news Mark, all the best. Don't forget the current feeling might be shock so prepare yourself for a counter-reaction at some point.

[mik]

Sorry to hear that Mark, and my condolences too.

I lost my dad suddenly too - nearly 6 yrs ago now. I can’t add much that hasn’t already been said above. I found I spent a lot of time with my mum over the subsequent year- it was hard to see her losing her best mate.

Good luck for the next couple of weeks sir.

[240PP]

Sorry to hear, Mark. It must be one of the biggest upheavals in life so take it easy.