Sorry to read this Barry.
Mate of mine had a bit of a crisis early forties and made some decisions that ripped his family (wife & 2 kids) to bits. His son has had some real challenges and reached out to me for help/guidance for a 2 year period - I was very glad to step in and help, but really saddened at how relationships that should be so close can be destroyed by narcissism and it’s generally the older party that screws things for the younger ones.