Your fleet running reports

[Mito Man]

That’s disappointing but not surprising. Must have had at least 5 services which no one bothered?
I have my doubts that most places change anything bar the engine oil and filter.

[Beany]

I assume you already priced up and prepped for an 'all fluids, all filters' service when you took the brave pills and bought the thing?

If not, now's the time because if air filters haven't been done (And in fairness, the filters might have sat on the shelf a while before being used, but that doesn't fill them with toot....) you can bet your boots that the rest of the most recent service was literally just a "here's £500 cash, just stamp the book would you" sort of job.

[Sundayjumper]

I assume you already priced up and prepped for an 'all fluids, all filters' service when you took the brave pills and bought the thing?

Well, no actually, because there's an invoice for £2,311 from January at a respectable *main dealer* for a full service including brake fluid & all belts. So I sorta assumed air filters might have been done. But curiously, they're not listed on the invoice. Everything else is, right down to the sump plug gasket for 48p. So on the bright side it looks like they didn't charge for stuff they didn't do, but on the flip side they (and everyone else that's serviced it since 2008-ish) didn't even bother checking. Because if air filters are - inexplicably - not part of a normal service, then "sir, you need new air filters, that will be an extra £xxxx" is a very easy upsell.

...the filters might have sat on the shelf a while before being used...

For nearly 15 years ?? I doubt it !

Anyway, there's some genuine ones on ebay for £30 each, or pipercross foam upgrade (?) for £35 each. Really not the end of the world. It's just yet more evidence to me that service history doesn't mean much.

[nuttinnew]

Obviously some dodginess has gone on somewhere along the line, but BIC, and from the sounds of the last service the mileage/time didn't tally up with the service interval for the air filters (I haven't a clue what Ferrari say to do when though, they may say inspect them at each service). I'm not defending the dgaf attitude evident by any means, just want the right people first against the wall.

[Sundayjumper]

Having checked the schedules, the annual service only specifies "check air filters & replace if necessary". So a fair amount of discretion in terms of "necessary" but I'd suggest that nobody has *really* checked these for at least the last ten years.

[GG.]

I had this with the 997 where for some reason the air filter hadn't been changed for 4 years or so as its not on the service bulletin. Weird.

When I moved from Parr to 9e they picked up on the first service they did.

[tim]

Mondeo Man 2.5 TURBOT Volvo Engined TittyX Update

It's been almost 5 months and a smidge over 3,000 miles since I bought my 2008 Mk4 Mondeo 2.5T Titanium-X, so here's an update.

It does what it says on the tin. Is comfy and goes pretty well. The End.

I like it, but I don't love it. It's an appliance, albeit a quite nice one from a gadgets and comfort point of view. I know it will start, and get me where I'm going, and back! These are novelties after a couple of years with an XJ8, and I'm thankful for that. I drive even less now I've moved, which is probably why I've no real desire to replace this with anything newer or fancier anytime soon. It's MOT is due in November and I'd be hard pushed to think of anything that would get in the way of that.

There was a wiring issue, which I bodged with electrical tape. A lot of the insulation had deterioated and crumbled away when it was moved, from a couple of the coilpacks and the two cam position sensors, exposing bare wires, and blowing a fuse as a result. The wiring itself was fine, so I taped them all up and it's been good-as since. I discovered this when I decided to replace all the spark plugs as the well documented service history file didn't appear to have any mention of them being done for quite a long time. It didn't drive any better after mind.

I replaced the rear disks and pads, which was a bit of effort getting some of the nuts off. An excuse to buy a set of air-powered rattle guns tho.

The nearside headlamp is condensating badly, but I think it's possible to split the glass from the plastic, so if I can do that safely I'll get some sealant and that'll probably sort it. Doesn't seem to affect the lighting performance at night tho.

They are clearly not drivers cars. This will come as no surprise to anyone. It's almost impossible to heel and toe, which coupled with the exceptionally good NVH means you can barely hear the engine and blipping down the gears smoothly took a long time to master, especially if you're block changing down the 'box. It's not an easy car to drive smoothly as you just have no real idea what the engine is doing. It's quite odd in that regard.

But if you're not interested in the process of getting from A to B, just getting from A to B in quiet comfort, then it's pretty great at that.

It would be nice to hear that Volvo 5 pot engine a bit more - it's way more vocal in the Focus ST, but the Mondeo doesn't have the sound generator pipework in the engine bay. At £1400 owed to me, it's absolutely not worth spending any money on a nicer exhaust or induction muppetry so it is what it is.

Performance wise it's about the same as the XJ8, which is to say, sprightly enough. 3rd is a good overtaking gear, and it does pick up well. Will also quite happily tickle along in 6th at 35 mph with enough torque to feel unlaboured. A bluefin would give a decent performance boost, but really, why bother? £450 I'll never see again.

Fuel economy is relatively shit by modern car standards but a lot better than the 21-22 I was getting from my XJ8. I reset the fuel computer when I bought it and have not reset it since, and is now showing 31 mpg. It's got a 500 mile range tho, which is decent. I don't drive enough for it to matter much.

Me and the kids are off on our annual 1200 mile trip through France next week, and although I have spent £90 on european breakdown cover for the trip, just in case, it doesn't give me the fear taking it like the XJ8 would have. Jeez, I have the fear just thinking about thinking about taking that.

175,000 miles and you wouldn't really know to look at or drive it. I think I've probably officially handed-in my Car Guy card for the time being.

[Sundayjumper]

The nearside headlamp is condensating badly, but I think it's possible to split the glass from the plastic, so if I can do that safely I'll get some sealant and that'll probably sort it.

If you can bring the assembly indoors and dry it out thoroughly, some superglue will probably sort it without needing to split it.

Dribble the glue along the seams where it might be leaking. Capillary action will draw it in (you can buy super glue in different viscosities for exactly this) and because it cures by reaction with moisture*, it'll cure in exactly the right places. I did this on the Cayenne headlights and it worked perfectly.


* this is why it sticks your fingers together instantly

[Beany]

Yeah, what struck me about the way my one drove is that it being a fairly large car doesn't get too much in the way of making progress - it doesn't understeer at the slightest provocation, it's not so soft and baggy that you feel you have to slow right down for corners or roundabouts etc. It behaves quite a bit better than it reasonably needs to.

Quite surprised your getting 30mpg out of it - I'd have expected a bit lower perhaps, even if just used for longer stuff.

[Jimmy Choo]

MOT Fail on the StealthBimmer for a brake hose. It's booked in for that to be fixed on Thursday before a retest on Friday. I'm taking it down to Totnes on Friday so it's all a bit rushed.

[tim]

If you can bring the assembly indoors and dry it out thoroughly, some superglue will probably sort it without needing to split it.

Dribble the glue along the seams where it might be leaking. Capillary action will draw it in (you can buy super glue in different viscosities for exactly this) and because it cures by reaction with moisture*, it'll cure in exactly the right places. I did this on the Cayenne headlights and it worked perfectly.

Good tip, thanks!

[John]

If you can bring the assembly indoors and dry it out thoroughly, some superglue will probably sort it without needing to split it.

Dribble the glue along the seams where it might be leaking. Capillary action will draw it in (you can buy super glue in different viscosities for exactly this) and because it cures by reaction with moisture*, it'll cure in exactly the right places. I did this on the Cayenne headlights and it worked perfectly.

Good tip, thanks!

This stuff is good too

[Explosive Newt]

If you can bring the assembly indoors and dry it out thoroughly, some superglue will probably sort it without needing to split it.

Dribble the glue along the seams where it might be leaking. Capillary action will draw it in (you can buy super glue in different viscosities for exactly this) and because it cures by reaction with moisture*, it'll cure in exactly the right places. I did this on the Cayenne headlights and it worked perfectly.

Good tip, thanks!

This stuff is good too

But it really affects your targeted ads if you Google it.

[Delphi]

Odometer gear for the 928 has arrived so this week I'll be fixing that this week. I noticed a small wet patch underneath the back of the car, which appears to be fuel. I've not removed the cover yet, but I suspect it's either the fuel pump or filter. Both are less than a year old, so I'm puzzled as to what's going on. I'll pull the cover and have a look.

[Sundayjumper]

Continuing progress on various jobs. Two biggies that (hopefully!) have turned out to be smallies:


1) There was a tapping noise from the top of the engine. Could be injectors (mildly annoying but not really a problem) or sticky / leaking lifters (potentially a big ££££££ headache). But no ! It's another common problem, and it's neither of those things, yet somehow there's minimal info on fixing it. Inside the plenums looks like this:



The open barrels feed across to the other bank, giving a long path for better torque at low engine speeds. At high speeds the butterflies open to allow a direct feed straight down in to the cylinder. If there's some play in the system they rattle in time with the pulses of air going past them underneath. Sounds *exactly* like injectors / lifters. Several posts online say that the solution is to remove the butterflies and re-bush the shaft they sit on. I realised that the rattling isn't due to the shaft moving up/down/side-to-side inside worn bushings, it's rotating (as it obviously needs to be able to do) because the mechanism is worn and not holding them firmly closed. Adjust mechanism, problem goes away ! Done.


2) It was starting to puff blue smoke on startup. A friend popped over at the weekend and when I started it up it was a bit embarrassing. It also wasn't idling smoothly until warmed up. This turns out to be a common problem, oil getting drawn into the intake plenums and then sucked into the engine. A little bit of oil is not a problem. A lot starts giving you blue smoke and can gum up the spark plugs if it's not driven enough it burn it off. The problem is simply down to over-filling the oil. The dry sump system makes it tricky to get the level right and the early version of the swirl tank (that mine has) is known to exacerbate it, even when filled correctly. Not my picture but it ends up looking like this:



So I've drained a small amount of oil and driven it a bit more with some higher speeds instead of the local pratting about I'd been doing while getting used to the car and <touch wood> it's not doing it any more.


And onwards...

3) The F1 gearbox is an automated manual, the box itself is the same as the manual, but with actuators added to do the shifting & clutching for you. Quite different to drive compared to a slushbox or a modern DSG. I'd felt it was a bit "soft" pulling away from standstill, feathering the clutch a lot more than I'd expect. When it was serviced in January, clutch wear was reported as 33%, so plenty of life there. Driving it slightly faster (ahem) last night the shifts at high speed are actually a bit scary. It's leaving the clutch open for too long then banging it back into gear. Enough to light up the TC warning. I'm pretty sure this is down to a calibration issue, the key setting is the PIS - "Punto di Incipiente Slittamento" aka point of initial slip. That tells the car *exactly* where the biting point is. It should self-adjust as the clutch wears down but it frequently doesn't, or doesn't do it right. The result is that the car is in effect pushing the clutch pedal much too far each time. Too much time disengaged. It's DIYable as long as you have one of the posh scanner tools; £500-ish. Or a lot less at a specialist as it's a pretty easy job. But I bet I'll be needing the scanner again for other stuff so I guess I'll bite the bullet there.

4) Needs a new thermostat. Noticeable last night that the heater was warm when I set off, was cold after a steady gentle d/c run @ 80mph, then warmed up again when the speed dropped. Not expensive, just a bit of a faff to get at. A job for this weekend I reckon. And if the car is getting stuck on a cold running map, that may well be affecting the gear change too.

[tim]

BMW R1250RT LE BestBikeInTheWorld Edition Update slash Rant

Needs a service. It's a big 'un, but lots of the jobs I can easily do myself. So figured I'd save myself a few hundred quid and buy some service parts and crack on, then get my preferred bmw-motorrad dealer to do the valve clearences and air filter (ridic amount of plastic has to come off to get to that, and I don't fancy it) and reset the service light.

Unfortunately my preferred bmw-motorrad dealer is quite a long way away in Bandit Country (suffolk), and since I just need parts, I figured I'd ride up to the local one lunchtime and pick them up. I loathe setting foot in that place for many reasons, but I had a sharp reminder of one of them today.

My parts list is:

1. 4 litres of BMW Advantec 5w40 Oil
2. Oil filter
3. Oil drain plug washer
4. 2 spark plugs
5. 180ml of gear oil for shaft drive (annoying only sold in 500ml bottles)
6. Shaft drive fill plug washer
7. Shaft drive drain plug washer
8. Rear brake pads

I phoned ahead with the list. How long, do you reckon, was I stood at the parts counter waiting for this to be sourced and picked? 5 mins? 10?

FORTY.

FFS. I hate them so much. But it needs doing and I've a fair bit of riding this week so I want to get it done quicker than I could go to where I should really have gone in the first place. £214 in bits too, but I guess that'd be the same everywhere.

Why are people so inept?

[Sundayjumper]

Why are people so inept?

PEOPLE.

Recurring theme. People are the problem. Get rid of them. All of them.

[Beany]

I had a few more months in my mind before you had bits off the engine @Sundayjumper so fair play I guess

[tim]

In better news; I just changed the oil filters and plugs in an hour. Bikes really are piss easy to work on. Will do the shaft drive oil and brake pads tomorrow lunchtime.

Also; Steve I don't know what it is you do to afford this fine stable of automobiles, but I suspect you're wasted on that, when you could instead be doing this. Fair play for diving straight into a Fezza engine!

[Sundayjumper]

Fair play for diving straight into a Fezza engine!

Those aren't my photos ! But there's a 50/50 chance I'll end up taking the plenums off at the weekend to clean out any remaining oil. And do the thermostat. And once I get hold of an appropriate scanner I'll do a bleed of the F1 system which seems to involve removing the actuator block from the side of the gearbox. Deep breath before doing that because a new actuator block is..... £9,856.06 + VAT.

https://www.ferrariparts.co.uk/part/ferrari/181161

Bikes really are piss easy to work on.

Ferraris are the same, just bigger. It's only nuts & bolts.