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Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 11:57 am
by Sundayjumper
Some b*stard has put a lock on their milk. Do they expect me to drink my tea black ??

milksecurity1.jpg
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Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 11:58 am
by Jobbo
You could use the out of date bottle to the right?

However, use cunning and skill. Start here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCm9K6r ... igLoZOh6FQ

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 12:06 pm
by GG.
:lol: did someone go to the effort of drilling a hole through the end of that metal spoon...

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 12:07 pm
by Simon
That is genius. :lol:

Just cut the bottle off though, right?

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 12:17 pm
by GG.
I'd take more pleasure from the secret assassins method - empty the out of date milk, pierce a tiny invisible hole from a board pin in the bottom of the Waitrose one and drain the milk into the empty carton leaving the spoon-lock contraption intact. A perfect crime 8-)

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 12:26 pm
by Mito Man
Yep that has great potential for messing about with :lol:

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 1:12 pm
by ZedLeg
GG. wrote: Thu Oct 11, 2018 12:06 pm :lol: did someone go to the effort of drilling a hole through the end of that metal spoon...
Probably not ;)

Image

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 3:17 pm
by mik
Do this.

Replace with identical padlock.

<evil laugh>


Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 3:42 pm
by Jezh
Put superglue in the lock and combo wheels. That'll learn them :lol:

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 3:45 pm
by Mito Man
Drain the milk and replace it with the soya milk for the ultimate troll.

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 3:54 pm
by ZedLeg
HOT TAKE

Soy milk is better than cows milk and oat milk is better than either.

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 3:57 pm
by mik
ZedLeg wrote: Thu Oct 11, 2018 3:54 pm HOT TAKE

Soy milk is better than cows milk and oat milk is better than either.
Yeah. And replace the plastic carton with one made from (pre-cuddled) hemp: ;)

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 4:26 pm
by GG.
ZedLeg wrote: Thu Oct 11, 2018 3:54 pm HOT TAKE

Soy milk is better than cows milk and oat milk is better than either.
I can only presume you've been drinking bull's milk by mistake if you genuinely think that's the case.

Remember... If there's only one large, firm, teat - therein lies your clue.

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 4:59 pm
by ZedLeg
As reasonable and understated response as ever GG.

I've not had cows milk for years, it makes my missus sick and I didn't care enough to start buying separate milk for myself. Now I'd rather have oat milk than any animal milk.

I will concede that real dairy ice cream tastes better than any non dairy stuff but again I'm not fussed enough to ever buy any.

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 5:06 pm
by GG.
Can't you buy lactose free milk or is it something else in the milk that upsets her?

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 5:19 pm
by ZedLeg
You can but we prefer the non dairy, I’m not sure what’s so hard to grasp about that?

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 5:30 pm
by Rich B
ZedLeg wrote: Thu Oct 11, 2018 5:19 pm You can but we prefer the non dairy, I’m not sure what’s so hard to grasp about that?
Your gf is sick with stuff she doesn’t “prefer”?

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 5:32 pm
by GG.
We seem to have gone from bull semen to bull shit :lol:

Does anyone really prefer the taste of dairy substitutes or is the reality is that people are just resigned to it.

You know what - fillet steak is pretty damn good but since going out with my vegan girlfriend, I've realised I really actually prefer griddled Quorn!

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 7:52 pm
by Mito Man
For what’s it’s worth I prefer cow milk but would happily drink bull semen over anything that comes from a goat.

Re: Milk Security

Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 7:55 pm
by GG.
Goats cheese is ok - the milk, not so much.

When I become benign overload, all non milk milks will have to be properly described. Emulsified blended oat water, for example.