OV9

HBYOC.

Don't drink too much!

16vCento wrote: ↑Tue Jun 28, 2022 8:33 pm HBYOC.

Don't drink too much!

The new Beany is a man transformed. If he wants a double kale and sprouts smoothie, then that's exactly what he'll have!

No, I'll get wrecked on Friday and ruin my entire weekend, but I've got more ISO27001 tomorrow so best to be A Good Boy tonight.

Chloe at Lidl (young, pretty and pleasantly gobby) reckons I look 35 so I'm taking that as my birthday present.

I am 35 on Thursday

I feel very old, house and dog shopping this weekend rather than 3am nights out.

3am nights out are overrated. Mostly because I can't handle the mornings any more

Still can't believe I spent my work birthday in a fucking ISO audit still, we've been renewed and apparently I said the right things at the right time and I've got a decent idea of how the sausage is made now, so when (not if) I have to do stuff within it, I'll have a head start and won't be spending hours trying to get my head around it.

So there's that.

16vCento wrote: ↑Tue Jun 28, 2022 11:22 pm I am 35 on Thursday

I feel very old, house and dog shopping this weekend rather than 3am nights out.

Happy birthday for yesterday.

It's mine tomorrow, also turning 35, and my wife has left me (for the weekend to see her brother in Germany) with two kids to look after, so no 3am nights out for me either.

Birthdays absolutely get less important each year that passes!

Happy Birthday!

I stayed in and made tea on my birthday, off to see Peter Hook tonight though, and heading out now so I'll be making up for it!

Happy birthday to you both!

Spent half the night feeling nauseous (probably overeating or something) and got sod all sleep, sent my apologies to work after failing to have breakfast (the concept turned my stomach) and they were all 'no worries, take it easy and feel better'.

I was confused by this and it took me till lunchtime to stop checking Slack on my phone.

Feeling a bit better tonight (in all respects) so a light dinner methinks.

Imagine, not being chased for work when you're feeling like shit. What is this bizarre concept?

Are you beginning to understand why I had so much conviction about you owing nothing to your absolute clownshow of a previous employer?

Well done Bean, as I said right near the beginning - you deserve this - and it's not even anything beyond what should be normal!

^ RIC

KevH18 wrote: ↑Fri Jul 01, 2022 12:23 pm

16vCento wrote: ↑Tue Jun 28, 2022 11:22 pm I am 35 on Thursday

I feel very old, house and dog shopping this weekend rather than 3am nights out.

Happy birthday for yesterday.

It's mine tomorrow, also turning 35, and my wife has left me (for the weekend to see her brother in Germany) with two kids to look after, so no 3am nights out for me either.

Birthdays absolutely get less important each year that passes!

Belated HBYMOC both, I hope they weren't too bad.

Minor, but related update.

I've realised only the last few weeks just what a complete hole my house is, so I've been going through tidying up. It's not a small job.

I finally got the last of the glass (bottles etc) to the tip today.

Did three runs myself. Then ate the shame and took up my neighbours offer of help to clear out there last of it in the office.

Five (2 X two car, one X one car) runs and an hour later and it's finally done.l - would have taken me all night to do myself.

As an example of just how poorly I've been looking after myself, basically - no point giving a shit about the state of the house when your aren't sure if you can afford to eat for the rest of the month because an unexpected bill has come in, etc.

So that's nice. Also got a cheap wee cordless vacuum from Lidl three other day which is just the ticket for clearing up the likely 5 square meters of cobwebs in this place. It does a passable job on carpets but I've got an old Dyson for that (which needs a full service, or replacing - possibly replacing as dc01s have terrible hose suction - the cordless one is genuinely better for that as it stands)

So, in short, low level life improvements.

The landlord popping in on Friday might be a bit of an encouragement for this, but I'm dealing with it rather than panicking - another improvement.

I think I've said it before, but fuck me I can't believe I let things get so bad, for so long. I know why it happened, and how it happened, but bloody nora....

Oh, justification for the above is that people should talk more, and more openly, about their mental health, fuck off of you don't like it

Absolutely. I don't know you in person but genuinely impressed with you getting your self together.

Carlos wrote: ↑Wed Jul 06, 2022 10:54 pm Absolutely. I don't know you in person but genuinely impressed with you getting your self together.

Lets not stretch our definitions here - I'm getting myself into a position where getting myself together might be a realistic prospect

Ultimately I'd like to be in the position where if the landlord calls up, and says 'I'm in the area, can I pop in sometime this week' I can say 'sure, what you doing Tuesday?' and not be remotely phased by it.

Which might sound absurd, but it should, hypothetically be relatively easy to achieve once I get some baseline habits in, which I can't get in till I get into certain smaller, more achievable habits, etc.

Start small, get into easy habits, expand those habits out, become A Person or something approximate to that

My wife has huge anxiety issues, to the point if she was in a shop looking for a product and wasn’t able to find it she would leave without it rather than having to ask someone- and if someone saw her looking lost and offered help she’d say she was fine and run away even quicker

Now she has meds to help her cope, she’s much better, but she still gets an enormous sense of achievement when she does something “normal” like pay for something at a manned checkout, or ask for assistance or make a telephone call.

A massive part of mental health is celebrating the small achievements and not feeling ashamed that something as simple as paying for a magazine is a big deal.

We’ve learned to celebrate the small stuff and the bigger stuff follows when the time is right without even realising it- she’s currently dealing with serious knee issues and been ringing/emailing the surgeons secretary all the time to chase progress- this would have been in no way possible a few years ago

Yup, the main thing that I've had to keep in mind is that most of my 'bad habits' aren't bad habits - they're symptoms of pretty crippling mental illness exacerbated by a bad job. Not character flaws or quirks.

That was a difficult stage to get to, frankly

Kudos on getting there. May it continue upwards, just remember 2 steps forward, one step back is still one step in the right direction

jamcg wrote: ↑Thu Jul 07, 2022 9:11 am Kudos on getting there. May it continue upwards, just remember 2 steps forward, one step back is still one step in the right direction

Very much this.

Sigh. Landlord looking to divest his portfolio and move to Greece so looks like I'll be moving house soon (although he has admitted that given my recent circumstances he's not looking to make any changes soon.

I suspect within a year he'll be pushing for it.

So that's annoying....

Edit: Landlord did suggest I could buy the place but no chance of saving the deposit in any reasonable time, and over 35yrs the mortgage would cost as much as the rent on a month by month basis - that and I could probably do with moving out of Pudsey to get away from the stank of my previous employer....