OV9

Barry wrote: Sat Jul 01, 2023 11:52 am

jamcg wrote: Fri Jun 30, 2023 11:46 pm I can’t have cheese before bed, it does weird things to me

That was what I was alluding to earlier. Nightmare fuel.

In my first business we always had a vision of diversifying into cheese. We wanted to get a wide variety of cheeses and then get people to eat them before bed, so we could monitor their dreams. Then we could work out what dreams people had after different cheeses. That would allow us to market them as different types of 'dream cheese' so you could tailor your dreams depending on what cheese you ate before bed.

Ever heard of sexsomnia? That’s what late night cheese does to me. Thankfully I have an understanding wife

I should add I think I’ve grown out of this….

jamcg wrote: Sat Jul 01, 2023 8:19 pm Ever heard of sexsomnia? That’s what late night cheese does to me. Thankfully I have an understanding wife

I should add I think I’ve grown out of this….

And what about the other person, were they understanding also??

IanF wrote: Sat Jul 01, 2023 8:57 pm

jamcg wrote: Sat Jul 01, 2023 8:19 pm Ever heard of sexsomnia? That’s what late night cheese does to me. Thankfully I have an understanding wife

I should add I think I’ve grown out of this….

And what about the other person, were they understanding also??

I’ve just realised how I made that sound

Seek forgiveness from Cheesus;

When I’m working in elderly women’s houses and ask for the gas meter I regularly get directed to “the glory hole under the stairs” yes, I do struggle to keep a straight face

An American wine connoisseur made the mistake of reviewing buckfast… Here’s their tasting notes:

Buckfast Tonic Wine (No Vintage)

Screw cap, took it off about 30 minutes before to bring in some air. Apparently made by monks in England. Decided to try while cooking dinner. Poured into a glass, first glance has a very inky almost brownish color that you see in older wines. Very syrupy, liquid clings to the side of the glass when swirled. Almost 15% ABV.

Stuck my nose in and was hit with something I’ve never experienced before. Barnyardy funk (in a bad way) almost like a dead animal in a bird’s nest. A mix of flat Coca Cola and caramel with a whiff of gun metal.

On the palate, overwhelming sweetness and sugar. Cherry Cola mixed with Benadryl. Unlike anything I’ve tasted. I’m not sure what this liquid is but it is not wine, I’m actually not sure what it is but it tastes like something a doctor would prescribe. A chemical concoction of the highest degree. Can only compare it to a Four Loko.

Managed to make it through a couple small glasses but not much more. Has absolutely ruined the evening drinking-wise for me as I tried to drink a nice Bordeaux after but the iron-like metallic sweet aftertaste I just couldn’t get out of my mouth even after a few glasses of water. I don’t drink a lot of coffee regularly so I also have mild heart palpitations from the caffeine after just drinking a bit of this and feel a slight migraine.

An ungodly concoction made by seemingly godly men. I believe the Vatican needs to send an exorcist over to Buckfast Abbey as the devil’s works are cleary present there. After tasting this “wine,” the way I feel can only be described as akin to being under a bridge on one’s knees orally pleasing a vagrant while simultaneously drinking liquified meth through a dirty rag.

I’ve drank a lot of wines in my life and will never forget this one.

Simon wrote: Sun Jul 02, 2023 11:54 am

Too soon, Elon?

A few of you might like some of this playlist;

Rammstein is always a correct choice.

jamcg wrote: Sat Jul 01, 2023 10:13 pm When I’m working in elderly women’s houses and ask for the gas meter I regularly get directed to “the glory hole under the stairs” yes, I do struggle to keep a straight face

That's what my mum refers to her under stairs as

Swervin_Mervin wrote: Tue Jul 04, 2023 8:40 pm

jamcg wrote: Sat Jul 01, 2023 10:13 pm When I’m working in elderly women’s houses and ask for the gas meter I regularly get directed to “the glory hole under the stairs” yes, I do struggle to keep a straight face

That's what my mum refers to her "under stairs" as

Ftao @Gavster I'm sure you've many a suitable recipe;

That reminds me of a past mistake;

Wilhelm?

Read the road, everyone stopped so be extra careful of people turning whilst filtering. Self preservation really does go a long way