How's work going?

[Simon]

Work is pretty 'meh' at the moment. So much so that for the last few months I've been looking around. I've spoken to a few startups and a couple of more well established companies, but no-one really makes me want drive hard for a role. The tech industry is having a bit of a wobble at the mo so I guess I'll be sitting here for the next 3-4 months to see how things pan out.

[Beany]

Hope the presentation goes well @Beany, I'm sure you'll smash it.

Unfortunately the place was bigger than I was expecting, there were more people than I was expecting, full PA system, lavier mics etc, and that overwhelmed me a bit and kicked off something I've not had for a while - a full blown panic attack.

Kept that under wraps (other than being pale and edgy), chatted with the MD, we agreed he'd present my presentation and I'd be off to the the side, mic'd up to inject more detail where required. That seemed feasible, less pressure.

Then the roof started leaking and due to time pressure, my slot was dropped

Other than the obvious, that was quite frustrating as I wanted to get my face in front of the client base a bit. Instead I spent most of the day in a stressed out blur.

Oh well. No one was 'bothered' as it were so it's fine professionally, just a bit of a bum day for me all round really. Bah!

[Simon]

Presenting is one of those things that does get better with practice. Nerves will ease when you're more comfortable with the talk track and familiar with the audience.

The first proper speech I ever gave was as best man at my brother's wedding. I too was bricking it, what with a room of 100 people, most of whom I didn't know.

Now it's pretty second nature.

See if you can get some proper presentation training if it's going to be an ongoing thing. It made a big difference for me. How to be confident with silence and gaps in the sentences is a real knack.

[Beany]

Yeah, that's the thing - I'm generally fine doing it in front of the company, that's for times a year or so - the customer facing one is once a year, so not many opportunities to practise.

Happy to chat away in front of 60 users on Zoom etc but in Preston is a different story.

I'll give it a try next year, it was just me from my team there so I felt pretty isolated anyway, is I can get one is m'colleagues alone next time I'll probably feel better about it, etc.

Or I'll just get them to do it - delegation

[dinny_g]

True about training - really helps.

Certain things are very effective but feel really awkward to you as the presenter. For example, stand still with your hands by your side, maintain eye contact with one person until you finish that sentence etc

Sounds weird but when you see yourself on video, you can get it

[Gavster]

Read and implement Robert Greene's 48 laws of power if you want to get the next promotion, work is a game that we all play and that book changed the way I deal with people, as well as helping to manage other people who were better at playing the game.

I've ordered that. Sounds like interesting reading!

It's very enlightening. While it sounds like a masterclass in manipulation, which to some extents it is, it helped me to understand exactly how or why I'd been played in the past by clients/superiors/colleagues.

[Gavster]

Yeah, that's the thing - I'm generally fine doing it in front of the company, that's for times a year or so - the customer facing one is once a year, so not many opportunities to practise.

Happy to chat away in front of 60 users on Zoom etc but in Preston is a different story.

I'll give it a try next year, it was just me from my team there so I felt pretty isolated anyway, is I can get one is m'colleagues alone next time I'll probably feel better about it, etc.

Or I'll just get them to do it - delegation

Presenting is an awful thing, I've sat shaking and nauseous in the loos before doing them a few years ago. One way I got over it was by attending lots of public talks and lectures and always asking a question. This usually requires standing up in front of 100+ people with a remote mic to ask the panel a question. It's a good halfway step to being on stage and really helped build my confidence talking in front of a large audience without too much pressure on the outcome.

Either way, the only out is through - e.g. doing it.

[Jimmy Choo]

their email sign-offs are awesome

- You get one warning to stop that. Any repeat and you're out the door. No warning, no dialog with HR, out the door.

On a similar note, I set my out of office message to "I'm out of the office on two weeks paternity leave. If you need to speak to me.... well, you won't because I'm being made redundant on the day I would have been returning."

HR made IT delete it.

[McSwede]

Yeah, that's the thing - I'm generally fine doing it in front of the company, that's for times a year or so - the customer facing one is once a year, so not many opportunities to practise.

Happy to chat away in front of 60 users on Zoom etc but in Preston is a different story.

I'll give it a try next year, it was just me from my team there so I felt pretty isolated anyway, is I can get one is m'colleagues alone next time I'll probably feel better about it, etc.

Or I'll just get them to do it - delegation

Beany, old bean. Check out the toastmasters website for a local meeting and pop along. This is what they specialise in so you can practice speaking in front of an audience then get help, advice, constructive feedback, etc..... Helped my wife with speaking in front of a room. Matthew Syed used them when he started out and highly recommends them.

[Explosive Newt]

I feel some guilt that I am slowly moving further and further from the NHS front line. The previous job in the heart attack centre was slightly removed but you still had A&Es and paramedics phoning you at all times of night. This job is very far away now.

But - the hell with it - they had my two pounds of flesh in the pandemic.

My current job involves alternating fortnights of working in the transplant unit and research. I enjoy both. Transplant is, by its nature, a very consultant-led speciality and even senior registrars like me don't get a lot of say in the larger aspects of planning patient management. Which is a bit frustrating, but I guess my time will come.

I hadn't anticipated how much of a challenge postdoctoral research can be. Not only do I have to deliver on the projects I rashly agreed to deliver over the next 3 years, but I also have to dream and scheme up the things I shall be doing over the 3 years that follow. Which involves so many moving parts (the results of my current work, the movement of the field, the resources available) it is a bit of a challenge.

[Explosive Newt]

That's very interesting because I'm on your former headspace, not the latter...

I suppose it a combination of me being my own worst critic sketchy line management at the moment and a CIO who hasn't the time for individual monitoring of performance.

I constantly deliver under very trying circumstances but the doubts are always there - Are these circumstances really that trying, could I have done more, could I have delivered earlier, could I have delivered cheaper.

Some of it is down to expectations which I know are unrealistic but then the doubts creep in - should I be able to do this etc.

I just try to get on with things but the doubts are always there in the background...

Those internal judgements definitely hold back progress. In my experience, there's rarely a definitive 'correct' answer in work and business - any solution is a good one. I learned some of my new way through working with an exceedingly annoying and irritating person whose default response to any query was "let's sort it out now". She'd always want to quickly find a way to deal with things right now, that could potentially solve the problem, so she could move onto the next task asap. That grated with my default of "let me think about it for a couple of days" in hope of finding the best solution. She was one of the most prolific and successful workers I've ever seen, clients loved her for it. Ultimately I put aside my judgements of her (interestingly, I wasn't only judging myself...) and tried her way of being and it definitely accelerated my progress.

Obviously I'm speaking as a freelancer/consultant/business owner who has the freedom to "fuck around and find out", rather than as an employee, although, as I also employ people, I do admire those who take the initiative to GSD, even if it's not how I would have asked them to do it.

That was my way, and I have increasingly drifted to yours. I thought it was a youth thing?

[dinny_g]

I’m 48 Newt - you’d think I’d know better at this stage…

Imposter Syndrome is a cunt…

[Explosive Newt]

I’m 48 Newt - you’d think I’d know better at this stage…

Imposter Syndrome is a cunt…

I’m not sure what it was exactly but it definitely occurred around the time of my PhD. Maybe it was just taking on that kind of big, long term project and being in a place where you couldn’t take short cuts. I became less of a hurrier but also less of a micro manager, maybe because I was seeing the big picture more.

[Jobbo]

their email sign-offs are awesome

- You get one warning to stop that. Any repeat and you're out the door. No warning, no dialog with HR, out the door.

On a similar note, I set my out of office message to "I'm out of the office on two weeks paternity leave. If you need to speak to me.... well, you won't because I'm being made redundant on the day I would have been returning."

HR made IT delete it.

I was about to send you congratulations and commiserations but then I remembered the snip

Work is good. It's a very different feeling being an employer heading into a very well signposted recession than it was to be an employee, so I'm glad I didn't buy a bigger house with a massive mortgage. It also means I can leave more money in the business to recruit (already seeing the evidence of good people being made redundant by big firms who over-recruited on silly salaries in the last couple of years) and to open a second office. Which will shorten my commute and give us more expansion space. Feels like I'm finally putting my own stamp on the firm having not initially changed too much while I got to grips with it.

[Jimmy Choo]

- You get one warning to stop that. Any repeat and you're out the door. No warning, no dialog with HR, out the door.

On a similar note, I set my out of office message to "I'm out of the office on two weeks paternity leave. If you need to speak to me.... well, you won't because I'm being made redundant on the day I would have been returning."

HR made IT delete it.

I was about to send you congratulations and commiserations but then I remembered the snip

I mentioned to the current lover that I'd had the snip 9 years ago.
She exclaimed "Oh my god, can you imagine having kids at our age!"

"Yes. That's why I had the snip!"

[Gavster]

I’m 48 Newt - you’d think I’d know better at this stage…

Imposter Syndrome is a cunt…

I’m not sure what it was exactly but it definitely occurred around the time of my PhD. Maybe it was just taking on that kind of big, long term project and being in a place where you couldn’t take short cuts. I became less of a hurrier but also less of a micro manager, maybe because I was seeing the big picture more.

I'm not surprised that a PhD slowed you down. Most of my work projects involve working with researchers within universities and they have an utterly confounding ability to send emails that are too long and absolutely impossible to respond to quickly. One particular uni department director had a habit of saying nothing for a month then sending a single email that suggested the entire theoretical foundation and direction of the project needed revisiting. After the shock of wondering why she didn't even discuss it with us, it usually took a week or two to work out what the actual fuck we could do. Really damaged any speed of development

[Ascender]

Main thing is you were ready to get up there and do it if you had to @Beany... everyone needs to start somewhere. Like everyone has said, practice is key and training if you can get it, but if you can't, I used to try and take one tip/improvement and focus on that in my next presentations for a while until it became second nature. Then look at another one.

Internal calls are great for practice and confidence building though. Like you say, it can be a bit daunting presenting to a new audience of any size.

[Beany]

Yeah, I chatted about it (and my history with panic/anxiety, which people were broadly aware of as I've spoken about it before) on the morning call today and (completely unsurprisingly) everyone was very cool about it, and I warned that reports of me going about with a bucket and a ladder would result in cries of slander

The sales director (who did most of the organising etc) apologised to me too, as I had slacked him that I was feeling a bit shaky but I'd speak up if it got worse - he had his slack off, though as he was, you know, organising - perfectly reasonable, and as promised, I spoke to the MD and we tried to arrange something so no apology necessary IMHO - it's the thought that counts though.

It'll be fine - perhaps next time I'll do it on Zoom from outside the conference room

[Nefarious]

Beany - back in my former analyst days, I once had to give a presentation at some food and drink conference. We used to do these things for free, with the main idea that you present, then network after to drum up sales leads.

I had a bit of a moment, kinda muddle through but cut my presentation short by 10 mins (of 30), quietly slipped out of a fire exit, and told work that it had just been a bit dry for leads.

[Beany]

Yeah, my plan was if I felt I was definitely gonna faint, I was gonna say "Hey Aude, lets see you follow this up....!" before collapsing in a heap.

Gotta have a sense of humour about these things etc.