Your fleet running reports

[Beany]

(apparently 'bang' has changed from 'to fuck' to 'to fight' in youth parlance lately)

Gosh. Imagine the misunderstandings that must have happened during the transitional phase.

A mate of mine works with, lets say, youths from bradford.

He delights in pointing that out.

"Yeah if that prick keeps chatting shit, I'll bang him" (bigging himself up etc)
"Well, you just make sure you use protection and use lots of lube, I mean it's unconventional but I'm sure it'll at least cut the tension between you" (all chest puffing energy disappears)

[Mito Man]

The bang thing can work both ways. Some gangsters will ‘bang’ (in the erotic sense) other gangsters to stamp their authority and make it clear that the bangee is the bitch. So yeah, proceed carefully with that

[Beany]

The bang thing can work both ways. Some gangsters will ‘bang’ (in the erotic sense) other gangsters to stamp their authority and make it clear that the bangee is the bitch. So yeah, proceed carefully with that

Oh the guy in question is the archetypal plastic gangster which makes it even funnier.

[integrale_evo]

X5 appears to have a leaking radiator, I think I’ll be going aftermarket for £120 rather than the £550 bmw want.

As usual with older vehicles, the question is what else to do ‘while you’re there’

To be honest, everything else looks ok so tempted just to do a coolant flush and call that it.

[integrale_evo]

Ooh, forgot, later today I have to change a brake light bulb on the sister in laws 1st Gen 1 series.

So far she, my mrs, and my 24 year old nephew have failed. Halfords were too busy, the local motor store tried telling her they were led panels and she would need a whole new light.

I predict it will take me longer to walk from the house to the car and open the boot than the actual bulb change. I bought a pair to do the other side.

[Mito Man]

The X5 I suspect due to a low battery managed to break both of its electric boot opening actuators. I think one opened just before the other and they both skipped a gear so it sounds horrific and just about struggles to function now whilst sounding like a cement mixer.
Parts are NLA although there’s a few places selling old BMW stock for £500 a side.
Aftermarket is £120 a side.
Went on Ali Express and found the exact same part for £100 for the pair. Which is still preferable to my dad’s suggestion of “just stick some fucking normal gas struts on it”

[Rich B]

Ooh, forgot, later today I have to change a brake light bulb on the sister in laws 1st Gen 1 series.

So far she, my mrs, and my 24 year old nephew have failed. Halfords were too busy, the local motor store tried telling her they were led panels and she would need a whole new light.

I predict it will take me longer to walk from the house to the car and open the boot than the actual bulb change. I bought a pair to do the other side.

Let us know the results! Video it for good measure!

I did the headlights on the 320d the other day, it's quite well thought out system, there's a removable panel in the front wheel lining that gives you access to the back of the light. The only issue is that some moron specced 19 inch wheels that fill the arches pretty well, so it was a bit cramped up with knuckles against sharp edges etc. still a 5 minute job though. I didn't enjoy it.

[Jobbo]

It fits. Wasn’t thinking I’d use the car port but actually I might. Should mean no windscreen scraping on icy mornings.

[MikeHunt]

It fits. Wasn’t thinking I’d use the car port but actually I might. Should mean no windscreen scraping on icy mornings.

Very nice, you need to have something for the weekend in the locked garage before it becomes taken over by tools and junk

[Jobbo]

I had the Audi in there first to unload car mags, but it will be where the mower lives I’m afraid. I thing longer term the open bays will get doors.

[Mito Man]

Good idea to get doors otherwise you get bats, kestrels, swallows all move in and it becomes a parkour place for cats.
Also nothing shits like a kestrel. It’s like a seagull shit mixed with gorilla glue if it stays on the car for more than a day.

[NGRhodes]

After a disappointing trip to Halfords, where they did not have any of the wax gloss or piggy back fuse connectors I needed, back home I managed to get the biggest of the scratches on Steve cleaned up (about 2 cm long, 2 or 3 mm wide). Quick scrape with a tiny screwdriver, a rub with folded wet-n-dry, 20 minutes soak of rust eater, then a thin coat (using a piece of plastic to skim the excess off) of touch up paint as the sun went behind the houses. Will need a bit of cutting and a dab of clear coat.
Also managed to touch a few of the deepest stone chips that were down to the metal. I am not after perfect bodywork, I am a fan of Wabi-sabi for daily/regular use items, but want to make sure that its all sealed and wont rust.

[NGRhodes]

It fits. Wasn’t thinking I’d use the car port but actually I might. Should mean no windscreen scraping on icy mornings.

Nice stables for the vehicles, love wooden design

[Sundayjumper]

Porsche extracted from the garage too having not moved since the last MOT. Off for a new one on Tuesday.

IMG_0268.jpeg (175.23 KiB) Viewed 359 times

[Sundayjumper]

Fleet related, my garage is out of control, I have heaps of "stuff" stacked all over the floor with no real home, it's getting impossible to find anything when I need it. Lots more storage & organisation needed. To that end I've just bought two 4-drawer filing cabinets for £15 each. That'll get some of the stuff up off the floor. I'm planning on having a drawer per car representing the to-do list for each. Next I need a load of shallow drawers for smaller bits & bobs.

Also spotted this. Lovely but I'm not spending that much on a bench. Or driving to Wigan with a trailer to collect it.

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/326019451652

[integrale_evo]

Ooh, forgot, later today I have to change a brake light bulb on the sister in laws 1st Gen 1 series.

So far she, my mrs, and my 24 year old nephew have failed. Halfords were too busy, the local motor store tried telling her they were led panels and she would need a whole new light.

I predict it will take me longer to walk from the house to the car and open the boot than the actual bulb change. I bought a pair to do the other side.

Let us know the results! Video it for good measure!

I did the headlights on the 320d the other day, it's quite well thought out system, there's a removable panel in the front wheel lining that gives you access to the back of the light. The only issue is that some moron specced 19 inch wheels that fill the arches pretty well, so it was a bit cramped up with knuckles against sharp edges etc. still a 5 minute job though. I didn't enjoy it.

I believe it took approx 5 minutes in total. Three minutes for the first side, two for the second.

Pop a carpet panel behind the light out, push down a plastic lever and wiggle the bulb holder out as a whole unit.

Admittedly it was a little more complex than I thought it should be as the carpet liner is pretty rigid and the bulb holder is bigger than the hole and a bit awkward to wiggle out. Why they couldn’t have made the opening an inch bigger I do not know.

Anyway, even the non-blown one was pretty black which validated my decision to splash out a whole £4 on a twin pack.

[mik]

Porsche extracted from the garage too having not moved since the last MOT. Off for a new one on Tuesday.

Car crime!

[nuttinnew]

Anyway, even the non-blown one was pretty black which validated my decision

It's always worth splashing on twins.

[Gavster]

Anyway, even the non-blown one was pretty black which validated my decision

It's always worth splashing on twins.

That's great advice for escorts too.

Ford escorts, obviously

[jamcg]

As my wife is struggling more and more with mobility, getting in and out of a tiny little twingo was becoming more difficult by the day. Also living with such a small vehicle as your only car was not always without issue. So to that end it’s been replaced, but as it’s a “white goods” purchase it’s in no way shape or form fit for a new thread

IMG_0874.jpeg (154.28 KiB) Viewed 241 times

It’s a Ford Focus Active, meaning it gets a load of pretend off-roading bits superglued onto it, but it also has higher suspension than standard, which makes it easier for the mrs. to get in and out of it, without going for a bigger suv.

As it’s possibly the most boring car on the forum this will probably be the first and last update on it