Rich(er) folk (than me)

[mik]

For his birthday - we took eldest miklet to a restaurant tonight that Mrs mik and I have been to a few times. It’s out of town so a bit of a pain to get to, but the chef is young, talented and ambitious. Runner up on Masterchef The Professionals. Has worked as a not-head-chef in several Michelin-starred restaurants - this is his first headlining gig.

His food is utterly sublime. Every course / amuse bouche elicits a gurn of delight. Properly special. It’s a long way from cheap, but a fraction of what you’d pay in the establishments he’s worked in previously.

We’ve completed our starter when a table of 6 arrives beside us. All a little older. Overheard conversation is around travel to their second homes in SanFran / Florida and managing to get upgraded to 1st class upgrades on the business-class tickets they’ve bought. Fair enough.

Their courses start to come. Not a single “thanks/thank you” as their plates are placed in front of them. Conversation isn’t broken as they all tuck into the thermonuclear taste bombs.

It’s like someone has just served them up a Macy’s-D’s.

I get that familiarity breeds complacency - but - fuck me what a shame.

[Matty]

No excuse for manners, but if you regularly dine at the best places, it no longer becomes anything out of the ordinary and therefore lacks any reason to elicit a response. In the same way that I wouldn't have any response eating at a regular old pub, yet I'm sure the majority of the poorest in the country would consider it an 'event'

Either way, I do struggle with spending on expensive food. There's something about spending £50/head on a meal that feels incredibly wasteful....and at odds with normal values. For comparison, I've been after some new boots for work, but refusing to pay £80 for a pair that'll get knocked around even though a decent pair will probably last me at least 2-3 years. So I refuse to pay £80 for an item that will be useful to me for at least 2 years, but I'll pay £50 for some food that's gone in a couple of hours?

[duncs500]

Either way, I do struggle with spending on expensive food. There's something about spending £50/head on a meal that feels incredibly wasteful....and at odds with normal values. For comparison, I've been after some new boots for work, but refusing to pay £80 for a pair that'll get knocked around even though a decent pair will probably last me at least 2-3 years. So I refuse to pay £80 for an item that will be useful to me for at least 2 years, but I'll pay £50 for some food that's gone in a couple of hours?

Everybody perceives value differently though, so that's normal. Most people would find the amount of money most of us spend on cars completely unfathomable.

What's the place mik? We're big Masterchef The Professionals fans in our household.

[240PP]

It doesn’t matter what’s being served up to me, everyone is deserving of the same manners. I think it’s a growing epidemic of self-importance where other people not only do not matter, they don’t even register. This can often be compounded by wealth.

I see it a lot of it in Cheltenham. You’re unlikely to get stabbed or have your head kicked in here, but instead you’re amongst people who, despite their privileged upbringing and expensive schooling, are devoid of manners and aren’t up for waiting their turn at the bar like the rest of us. Predominantly the young, the older lot are ace.

[Gavster]

I think it's a matter of acknowledgement, if someone serves me then I'll thank them, regardless of whether it's a checkout cashier, a server in a restaurant, or the guy cleaning my wheels at the car wash. But then again I'm one of those weird people who talks to beggars on the street if they approach me for money. I might not give them money, but I'll definitely say a few words to them rather than pretend they don't exist*.

(* and no, the words aren't "get a job" )

[mik]

I shall amend the title, as - in the cold light of morning - this entire thread is rather stoopid.

It did seem a real shame to me that scoffs like this were clearly nothing special to them, but it's just the definition of spoiled isn't it? I fully appreciate the hypocrisy however when I don't get excited about things many others would consider a massive treat (having a car to drive, having any food on the table regularly, being able to put your heating on etc etc).



(In saying that - good manners do cost nothing )

[unzippy]

They may have not been impressed by the food - that's fair enough.

But not saying please and thank you It's not because they're rich, it's because they're rude wankers.

[Explosive Newt]

One thing that absolutely boils my blood is people being rude to serving staff. One thing being failing to exhibit basic manners, the other is being outright cruel to them because of something that isn't their fault (food's not right, wait was long, etc). When I have seen this in friends / acquaintances of mine it is invariably people who come from a position of priveledge and have never had to work in such a position, and I think tend to regard serving staff as essentially droids.

[integrale_evo]

I get the food being ‘normal’ to them, but it’s no excuse for being rude to the people serving you. I’ll say thank you to the teenager handing over my bag at McDonalds the same as someone on the till at a supermarket, serving me a drink at a bar or my meal in a restaurant etc.

[Marv]

When I went to the Nurburgring many years ago, on the ferry on the way there, we decided to get some soft drinks from the bar.

I said to the person at the bar "I'll have a medium glass of lemonade thanks" in a friendly and polite manner.

To which one of the people who I was with (a friend of a friend, who I'd only met that morning) interjected and told me to say Please to the barman, then went on a rant that bar staff aren't shown enough manners

Was I a TAUC for not specifically saying the word "please"...But being polite, friendly and still ending my sentence with thanks? I didn't think so*. And of course I 99.9% of the time say please and thanks, he'd just picked on the 0.1% of the time I slipped and hadn't.

Along with some other jobsworth things he did on the trip, he never did get invited on any of our subsequent trips.

*I'm willing to accept that I'm a TAUC in many other ways

[jamcg]

*I'm willing to accept that I'm a TAUC in many other ways

Isn’t that a requirement on the ov9 joining form?


I think it comes down to something other than money. I think it’s that they’ve never worked a low level job, never worked in customer facing service industry.

I get people looking down their nose at me. Yes I’m working in manual labour, with rough sandpaper hands that never come fully clean, however gas engineers are highly qualified, and have to pass more exams in my lifetime than almost every other job

I think how you treat people working below your level of employment shows the type of person you are. Glad I don’t work for any of them

[Gavin]

Some people have always had shit manners, some people can be dismissive and rude to serving staff. My Mother is unfailingly polite, (please and thanks yous) but I have pulled her up on a number of occasions in the past, where she has been rude and dismissive and unthinking to retail or serving staff. She was a teacher for her entire working life, although had worked in service type jobs as a student.

[Jobbo]

Scarily £50/head for a meal is not particularly high end dining now. But I do agree with Matty that if you eat high end food all the time you’re probably going to be more like the food critics on Masterchef or Great British Menu than someone who actually enjoys it.

Sorry, this wasn’t particularly relevant to the original sentiment.

[Broccers]

I find you always get better service by being polite and courteous.

[Mito Man]

Don’t ever be rude to someone that’s handling your food!

[duncs500]

I said to the person at the bar "I'll have a medium glass of lemonade thanks" in a friendly and polite manner.

I can see how that sentence could be said in a polite way. Don't beat yourself up about it Marv.

I think I'm too polite, I usually say my pleases, thank yous and sorrys automatically whether the person deserves that level of politeness or not. I thought it was the British way... I'd love to be a bit more rude sometimes.

My mate's missus is terrible for being awful to any staff who do anything she might perceive as slightly not right. I've had some eventful experiences when she's been around, it's really quite fascinating when it isn't embarrassing. Strange because she's quite a sweet person whenever there's no service staff around.

[ZedLeg]

The British embarrassment about complaining is so funny tbh.

I have no problem sending stuff back if it's wrong, at the same time though I'd never be rude to someone working service. Those jobs suck and people being arseholes make it worse.