Mental Health

[dinny_g]

With the exception of the childhood trauma part, you could be describing my other half. And for what it’s worth, the therapy and help is there to go from that to a pretty normal life.

I still have to unplug the plug beside my chair every night for her (despite leaving 4 or 5 others plugged in in the living room) but her main challenge (related to dates, anniversaries etc) has been addressed for the most part.

There are some amazing therapies and therapists out there so good luck on your journey.

One final thought and forgive me if I’m stating the obvious.

Be 100% open with the therapist. Trust them and tell them absolutely everything. Even if they don’t ask, volunteer it. Smoked a bit of skunk weed in college - tell them. You and you missus aren’t in a good place - tell them. You only get out of therapy what you give so if you hold back, you won’t get the full benefit

A friend spent a year in therapy telling telling his therapist exactly what he thought his therapist needed to hear in order for them to tell him what he wanted as a diagnosis. Which wasn’t the problem.

I can PM you my guys name if you like. He was brilliant

[Gavster]

The hardest conversation I had with a therapist was trying to explain why I didn’t like them lol took me months to build up to that convo

[mik]

Childhood was properly awful.

Recent events haven't helped. My closest family member passed this year, and my younger brother also passed recently (29).

Jeez dude, that sounds really tough. Condolences for your losses.

Everyone only has their own personal experience to draw from, and it was only really in adulthood that I started to fully appreciated that I'd been very fortunate in my upbringing compared to many kids.

Kudos to you for raising the topic. In my experience counselling can be powerful, and as someone who doesn't feel comfortable opening up to others ~ Dinny's guidance is good in that space.

Do try and take some time or find a way to recognise your strength and resilience though. Some folks are dealt a far harder hand than others, but whilst everyone tends to beat themselves up about their (self-perceived) shortcomings, suffers self-doubt, wishes they'd made some different choices in the past : you've made it through adversities and challenges that many never have to face or even consider. There are many elements (achievements, behaviours, values that you now present) that you should rightly feel proud of.

[jamcg]

Fast forward a few years, and things deteriorated. But weirdly, I hadn't really noticed!

It’s amazing how it sneaks up one you. I’ve been going to the doctors as I’ve been experiencing a massive amount of anxiety lately, coupled with a debilitating level of brain fog

I’ve had a really busy time with work/scouting/extra jobs for family etc. and the first thing I noticed was a complete inability to relax, just felt on edge, like I had to be busy. Then the anxiety built and built, and in me it manifests as ridiculously low tolerance of people and extreme anger outbursts. Medication is helping, but it’s made me realise this is the first time I’ve felt myself for as long as I can remember, so god knows how long this has actually been affecting me.


Sorry for the losses you’ve endured, and hope the therapy provides the help you need. Good luck with the job interview for Tuesday.

[StangMan_]

Thanks for all the comments, chaps. Really appreciate you all taking the time to post

The recommendations are really helpful. Dinny, if you see this, I would appreciate those details - thank you.

Beany, I totally agree on the Fuck It Bucket ( ) My old therapist had a similar thing going where you set aside time to deal with shit that was bothering you instead if just fussing on it all day. It's really useful and I'd forgotten about that!

Mik, you're 100% right. The main theme of a self help book I'm listening to is get into the habit of giving yourself more credit. I've noticed that I'm constantly beating myself up about stuff but I don't think I've ever given myself a pat on the back for anything

Jamcg, it's crazy, isn't it. I totally get where you're coming from as well as it all relates. Appreciate the words. Definitely feeling overwhelmed but staying positive. Hope the medication keeps working for you. I hear loads of people saying the meds help a lot.

[dinny_g]

The recommendations are really helpful. Dinny, if you see this, I would appreciate those details - thank you.

Just sent you a PM with the details