OV9

“That’s not fair”

Bit late to this thread - Ian's slept with 3 billion women and he's done? Prolific.

Just standard couple shit. In the 18 odd years of my relationship I think most cars were in my name. We always had "my" car and "her" car. We do both work though, and at the moment she is the main earner as I work PT and do the majority of child care.

Maybe she had just had a shitty day and decided that was the thing she wanted to stat a pointless argument about though? We have all done it or been on the end of it.

I would just repeat the given advice of FFS don't take relationship advice from JL!

Give her the X5 and let her pay the tax, insurance, servicing and fuel. You should get a years free running before she regrets it. Win win.

Which of course is not what she wants. She also doesn't want Ian to give her the money to pay for all that and organise it herself - she just wants him to say - here it is you can have it as a present and don't worry I'll do all the admin too.

"and oh look! The key is being brought to you on the horn of a fucking UNICORN and you've just been upgraded to an ACTUAL PRINCESS!"

Chicks. Fucking useless - thank god they're attractive or frankly we just wouldn't give a shit, would we.

JLv3.0 wrote: ↑Wed Apr 10, 2019 12:01 pm "and oh look! The key is being brought to you on the horn of a fucking UNICORN and you've just been upgraded to an ACTUAL PRINCESS!"

Chicks. Fucking useless - thank god they're attractive or frankly we just wouldn't give a shit, would we.

Ain't that the truth...

although I am reminded my some sage words my friend Des gave me...

"No matter how hot a girl is, no matter how attractive she is, no matter how fit she is, somebody, somewhere's sick of her shit..."

Roll on the Fembots I say...

It's all getting a bit MRA around here .

No, not really, whatever godawful white-knight that abbreviation signifies. Just annoying when women bitch about equality but then ignore the fact that that means being held accountable for clear and logical behaviour.

I don't know why you bother with them if you find them such hard work.

I think I hit the jackpot with the O/H. Although I earn 5 times what she does she still wants to pay her way with shopping, bills etc. Which is hard, because actually she should let me take the strain a little and leave a little money for herself to enjoy. It's ridiculous that there's such a pay disparity yet she considers it her responsibility to pay for 50% of the shopping etc.

So I find other ways to 'give' her money, like leaving large items off the weekly shop and then grabbing them from Tesco during the week at lunchtime, or 'forgetting' things we've spent on when she tries to pay me back a few weeks later.

ZedLeg wrote: ↑Wed Apr 10, 2019 12:33 pm I don't know why you bother with them if you find them such hard work.

Same here. But then - I still interact with you, and it's kind of the same

I just assume we're both trying to make the other one snap for our own amusement.

Indeed, which is daft really because neither one is ever going to budge.

NotoriousREV wrote: ↑Wed Apr 10, 2019 9:46 am

Rich B wrote: ↑Wed Apr 10, 2019 9:38 am Women don’t want to be “kept”, they want their own stuff and contribute equally. That’s easy enough before you have kids, but once you have kids their earning capacity is often screwed.

My Mrs works 3 days a week and looks after our little boy the other 2 days so her earnings are a lot less than mine, so I end up paying the majority of our bills, I paid for her car, I paid for the house deposit/etc....

However, we treat it like a team - we both contribute what we can (we don’t have a joint account). So it would be a bit cunty for me to claim it all as mine because I paid the money for it.

This. When I was young, my Grandma and Grandad drilled it into me that when you're married, you're an equal partnership and if you don't get behind that concept, you'll never last as a couple.

MrsREV works part time and brings in less than 10% of what I bring home. But she's the one that manages the house and the kids etc. All the money comes in, we pay the bills, we split what's left equally. But, I never feel guilty about buying myself a new bike or a car. "Her" BMW is financed in my name, V5 in hers. It is hers, though, as far as I'm concerned.

Holding my earning power over her would be a pretty shitty thing to do, IMO. She couldn't even afford to pay her "half" of the mortgage, never mind anything else.

All of that. An fact exactly all of that. We have joint accounts. Her money goes in to our "day to day" bread milk petrol ect account. Mine goes in to the bills account. Whats left after bills are paid goes into a savings account.

Her BMW was bought with mostly cash and some borrowed money from my folks at preferential rates - ie 0%. Its registered to her and we refer to it as her car. My BMW and Lotus are registered to me and we refer to them as my cars. However she can drive all of the cars as can i and we dont argue about ownership.

JLv3.0 wrote: ↑Wed Apr 10, 2019 12:46 pm

ZedLeg wrote: ↑Wed Apr 10, 2019 12:33 pm I don't know why you bother with them if you find them such hard work.

Same here. But then - I still interact with you, and it's kind of the same

I have PTSD over this subject.

Calm down gents! Only things “mine” are the cars and the dogs; the rest are “ours”.

The wife and I don't have a joint account, and she pays more or less half for shopping and bills and a bit under half for the mortgage. She'll also pay for some dinners out or we'll go halves or I'll pay, depending on nothing in particular other than who is more insistent.

I earn a good chunk more than her, but I also save up for things like house deposits and pay a bit more for a big ticket item such as a nice holiday. If she's spent her earnings in a given month I might cover a bit extra, but that's a pretty rare occurrence.

I don't think she really wants it any other way, she likes to pay for herself but also accepts that for us to have the lifestyle we want I have to pay a bit more for some things.

It seems to work perfectly well for us. I'm sure if we had kids and she couldn't work as much we'd have come to some sort of different arrangement to give her more independence.

I don't think she would ever consider one of my cars as hers, but if I was the sole bread winner I'd imagine I'd buy her one and leave it in her name so that it was indeed 'hers'. The lines would be pretty clear. People put value in different things and I wouldn't want to think of her car as mine because I probably would look after it better if it was mine. I'd also expect her to do her own servicing and admin on her car, even if I bought it!

Last proper relationship I can use as an example, we both paid equal amounts into a joint account to cover all the regular bills and a little extra to build up a slush fund for holidays etc. And day to day stuff just worked itself out, I'd pay for a meal/shopping, she'd pay next time etc. Anything outside of that we kept in our own accounts and spent as we saw fit. I had my own car/bikes, she had her car. There doesn't need to be a hard rule on this stuff.

Have to laugh at the immediate shaming tactics when someone so much as suggests women might think/work differently from men. We work differently, doesn't make one better than the other jeez.