People

[Barry]

I count myself (almost) lucky I work with socially anxious youngsters reading all these tales. When I ask for something it invariably gets done, it's only the quality of the job that's in question and they get two chances to rectify that before it escalates.

I have a two day Mental Health First Aider course in the new year too, God help them..

[Rich B]

do the needful

Yeah that's them

I fucking hate that phrase. Any email that has that phrase in it gets added to the end of my 'things I might do when I've finished watching YouTube and lancing my boils' list.

never seen that phrase before - I’d better set up a rule to make sure I never do...

[Orange Cola]

do the needful

Yeah that's them

I fucking hate that phrase. Any email that has that phrase in it gets added to the end of my 'things I might do when I've finished watching YouTube and lancing my boils' list.

It goes straight in the ignore pile.

I don’t know if it’s just me, but one of the people I’ve come across appears to have absolutely shocking English and email writing skills, they couldn’t communicate a thankyou without confusing the recipient. Until they have to send something to someone senior. I’ve watched them write out emails in their awful English and it’s taken them several minutes to compose the email of only a couple of sentences and this went on for about two years. One day I sat watching type out four or five paragraphs to a company director, they did it perfectly with no spelling mistakes and grammatical errors and took two minutes at the most.

I was gobsmacked that this fucker was taking the utter piss all the time. Is it a one off or are they all like that?

[Orange Cola]

I have a two day Mental Health First Aider course in the new year too, God help them..

That’s forward thinking!

[JLv3.0]

Try working with them almost exclusively for 14 years and then read my next "racist" outburst with that in mind.

[Simon]

I should say that sources of 'the needful' don't come from one continent alone. I've seen loads of different nationalities and ethnicities say it, even English. And I know that technically it's correct. It just sounds so fucking annoying.

[240PP]

do the needful

Yeah that's them

‘and reply with the same’.

What the fuck does that mean?!

[JLv3.0]

Have you noticed "itself" yet, as in "do the needful and revert* today itself"?

*"Revert" is another guarantee you're dealing with someone from a country that accepts open defecation.

[PreacherCain]

Have you noticed "itself" yet, as in "do the needful and revert* today itself"?

*"Revert" is another guarantee you're dealing with someone from a country that accepts open defecation.

I use "review and revert" all the time. And I prefer to shit in a well-appointed khazi, preferably with a heated floor.

[Mito Man]

What the fuck does that even mean

[GG.]

I've expunged it from use other than in its correct form meaning to move back to a prior state. Its no harder to type review and respond or reply in reality.

I didn't realise it was British Indian to start off with.

[V8Granite]

Just sack the twat.

I had one person very annoyed at me turning up and running a job, better than they had done in the past. Lots of snide remarks and comments in front of the local labour. In the end I said he isn’t welcome, get in the car and leave that afternoon, he didn’t get the message till I got 2 guys to empty his room and put his gear into a waiting car, smarmy prick.

A South Efrican boss of mine many moons ago gave me quite a good speech. It basically said rule your plebs (yep, anyone below him was a pleb or TCN) with an IRON FIST in a velvet glove. Treat them well but if they cross you, crush them.

Works well.

Dave!

[ste]

That works well in life generally. My first boss said 'speak quietly but carry a big stick'. It was a really shit way of saying the same thing.

HardFi put it well, albeit it in terrible English:

"There's just no point in cause unnecessary trouble
Just make sure you cause trouble when it's necessary"

[evostick]

A big fat woman reversed straight back into my transit today whilst it was parked up. Big fucking dent. I got her details and to be fair she was very apologetic.

As I was in a good mood (and the van needs other bits tidying as well), I told her to give me £200 and I'll not go through the insurance/hire vehicle rigmarole.

She replied 'I can only afford £100 because It's Christmas'.

No. It's not Christmas. It's November and you can wave goodbye to your fucking insurance excess and say hello to bigger premiums for the next few years you big blind cunt.

[240PP]

Excellent

[Simon]

A big fat woman reversed straight back into my transit today whilst it was parked up. Big fucking dent. I got her details and to be fair she was very apologetic.

As I was in a good mood (and the van needs other bits tidying as well), I told her to give me £200 and I'll not go through the insurance/hire vehicle rigmarole.

She replied 'I can only afford £100 because It's Christmas'.

No. It's not Christmas. It's November and you can wave goodbye to your fucking insurance excess and say hello to bigger premiums for the next few years you big blind cunt.

Did you verbalise your thoughts? Did she realise her excess is likely more than £100?

[evostick]

I did point that out. Not really interested in waiting for the imbecile to see sense though tbh.

£200 was more than generous.

[JLv3.0]

A big fat woman you say? We talking Gloucester Large?

[evostick]

She'd qualify. She was a dead ringer for Jocky Wilson. Sweat and everything.

[JLv3.0]

Sounds like Gloucester to me.