People

[NotoriousREV]

It's 10:17am and so far:

- I've been called a knob for pointing out that the Grosjean/Hulkenburg incident in yesterday's F1 was deemed a racing incident so not Grosjean's fault
- I've fallen out with my mum because she wants Golliwogs to come back
- Had a taxi driver driving so far up my arse that he nearly took me out on my bike
- Had his mate in another taxi try to block my progress because he saw me giving another taxi grief

Cunts. And you lot can fuck off as well.

[ste]

Meh, 2/10.

[NotoriousREV]

Meh, 2/10.

I'm at work now, so it might get worse. I could add "the fucking car park gate wouldn't open".

[240PP]

Meh, 2/10.

I'm at work now, so it might get worse. I could add "the fucking car park gate wouldn't open".

I have to go through two. The second of which won’t open until the first has closed. Invariably someone will arrive at the first while I’m waiting for the second to open, which causes the first to cease closing and open again, and the whole sorry process goes back to square one. This invokes an utterly disproportionate level of rage within me.

I try to remind myself that some people in the world are starving, dodging bullets on a daily basis or have just generally been dealt a bad one. And that sat in my warm, leather-lined car listening to whatever I want while waiting for a gate to open isn’t too bad really and I should be thankful for my lot. It never works though.

[Mito Man]

Here’s what annoys me the most. This can turn my day from great to utterly pissed off.

I’m waiting at the lift, say I want to go up, I press the up button. Another prick comes in, just presses both buttons together. Lift comes with a down arrow on it. Said twat gets in and invites me in. I say no thank you, I’m going up. Lift door closes. Ding 1 minute later. Same door opens, as twat also wanted to go up, but got in the down lift, so he went down to a lower floor as someone else was calling it, and has now returned. Now lift is pointing up so I get in for an awkward 30 second journey with said twat.
Happens at least once per 48 hours.

I mean if you don’t understand a simple 2 button up down concept you shouldn’t really deserve to live should you?

[JLv3.0]

This is a very Indian thing to do. They seem to think if you press both buttons, you have a higher chance of the lift arriving sooner, like you're covering all bases or something.

[dinny_g]

I think Rev should aim his significant intellect at solving the "Elevator Operating Logic" challenge rather than working on how councils can fix the roads more efficiently...

A far better gift to humanity...

Only place where elevators seemed to have any useable logic was the RBS building in Redhill where there were 6 lifts and a central control panel - you selected the floor you wanted and it told you the lift to take - simples and always seemed to work.

[JLv3.0]

Yeah this is a recent thing it seems. No buttons in the lifts themselves which can only be a good thing.

Another one from our subcontinental cousins is if the lift is believed to be at a lower floor, and you want to travel downwards, you need to press the Up button in the lobby to call the lift "up" to where you are.

It beggars belief.

[Jezh]

Let's hope they never have to get involved with one of these then

https://youtu.be/E7QlAsxJP-g

[PaulJ]

- Had a taxi driver driving so far up my arse that he nearly took me out on my bike

A gentleman would have taken you out first, then driven up your arse.

[DeskJockey]

- Had a taxi driver driving so far up my arse that he nearly took me out on my bike

A gentleman would have taken you out first, then driven up your arse.

[Gavin]

Well taxi drivers are cunts!

[NotoriousREV]

Well taxi drivers are cunts!

Fucking right. Every last one of them.

[Mito Man]

I don’t mind black cab drivers, it’s the private hire vehicles (Uber, Carrot etc) which annoy me. They seem permanently lost and distracted, no doubt due to using 4 different sat navs whilst fucking about on their phones looking for new business. Always in the wrong lane and usually pressing their horn for no fucking reason.

[GG.]

The worst bit is when they follow their sat navs which are at pains to stop them doing U-turns (for the obvious reasons given their driving ability) which results in them travelling miles out of their way if they miss a turning or to get to you at the beginning of a trip.

To be honest the Addison Lee cabs I get back from work frequently are no better - mashing at the throttle and brake in turn and trying to get air over the speedbumps. I've never really been one to get car sick but I've been suffering recently. The new Galaxy also seems to have much much stiffer suspension than the old ones which doesn't help at all.

[Mito Man]

My experience with Addison’s disease some months ago. “You better avoid Fulham road and use King’s road as there are major gas works.”

10 minutes later we are stuck in a 45 minute jam to cover 0.5 miles as the prick didn’t want to deviate from the navigation.

[Orange Cola]

My experience with Addison’s disease some months ago. “You better avoid Fulham road and use King’s road as there are major gas works.”

10 minutes later we are stuck in a 45 minute jam to cover 0.5 miles as the prick didn’t want to deviate from the navigation.

I wouldn’t pay for that.

[Orange Cola]

Yeah this is a recent thing it seems. No buttons in the lifts themselves which can only be a good thing.

Another one from our subcontinental cousins is if the lift is believed to be at a lower floor, and you want to travel downwards, you need to press the Up button in the lobby to call the lift "up" to where you are.

It beggars belief.

I have to work with a couple of them, they’re most lazy, work shy, argumentative, disrespecting, unprofessional and insulting people ever.

Over my many summer jobs as a student and professional working live I’ve been sworn at, threatened, invites for fights, all by the council estate lot when working in retail jobs. Nothing comes close to the gobsmacking insults I’ve had from the subcontinental cousins.

When asking one of them to do a job which is specific to their role and not something I can do as they were in between phone calls to their estate agent and solicitor “Why can’t you just do it yourself and stop making things complicated? It’s easier for you to do it than it is for you to disturb me and ask me to do it. All you do is create problems”

“Err, I think you’ll find it’s YOUR job to do it and it needs doing, so crack on”

“Well I’m delegating it to you to do some please keep me in the loop and do the needful”

When replying to a query “tell me, WHO of us is working on this project?”

“You, but not only have you not replied but I am also standing in for someone who would have done exactly the same thing. We need the information which you have”

“This isn’t working, you’re stepping on my toes, I will sort this”

“Well it’s taken you all day to provide a single date, when are you going to do it?”

“When I get round to it”

“Which is when?”

“*its a Tuesday* Maybe by the end of this week, no later than this time next week”

“A week, for looking up a single date on a plan?”

“You’re being difficult now, stop asking for such ridiculous demands”

When getting a promotion, “I’m going to get this changed back, I’m going to make sure your promotion is reversed and I’m going to get it done as soon as I can. You watch my words. I’m going to have your job. This isn’t fair on me, I needed this on my CV so I can further my own career. You’re just constantly making trouble for me and I don’t know why you took this from me as it should be my job. Just go away, get out of my sight”

*Gobsmacked*

They didn’t even apply for the fucking job, I knew I was the only applicant before I went in.

[JLv3.0]

do the needful

Yeah that's them

[Simon]

do the needful

Yeah that's them

I fucking hate that phrase. Any email that has that phrase in it gets added to the end of my 'things I might do when I've finished watching YouTube and lancing my boils' list.