Milk Security

[Beany]

Do this.

Replace with identical padlock.

<evil laugh>

Or just learn how to pick a cheap-as-shit combi lock and use the milk anyway.

Seriously, you can usually work out the combination by just feeling the rollers when pulling the hasp.

[Beany]

I figured a demonstration would be easier. Excuse the terrible, terrible music, this is just the first example of the method I've used to crack a few of these things that I could find.

Doesn't work on all locks (high end suitcases typically need a bit more work - Yes, CEO forgot his combination, yes my lock-cracking office chums and I cracked it in 30 mins...) but I doubt they dropped more than £5 on that lock.



The lock they are using will almost certainly be the cheapest, shittiest lock known to man. Crack it, learn their combination, enjoy free milk whenever you fucking well want.

[Mito Man]

I saw vegan eggs in Wholefoods a while ago, it was a genuine egg carton so I reckoned they had actually gone through the effort of making a vegan egg white and yolk and putting it in a calcium shell casing. Opened the bloody box up out of curiosity and it was a sachet of powdered crap!

[V8Granite]

The semi-skimmed water substitute insults me.

Blue/ gold or get out.

Dave!

[duncs500]

You can but we prefer the non dairy, I’m not sure what’s so hard to grasp about that?

Some people seem to be struggling to fathom the concept that sometimes when you try something new (even if through necessity), it is acceptable to go on to prefer it.

She tried to get me to try something other than cows milk for years, eventually I thought I'd give it a go, started with coconut but I wasn't sure about it, then tried oat milk and it is good. I prefer it to cows milk too. I've never been a big dairy fan anyway though to be honest as everyone knows.

[evostick]

Milk is disgusting stuff really but nothing works as well in a cup of tea.

I use stuff made with almonds on my cereal these days.

[duncs500]

In terms of the OP, simply has to be pranked one way or another.

[IanF]

That’s hilarious SJ! I’d buy two cheapo key-type padlocks, put one on it but put other padlock’s key into it, and just watch.

We currently have four different milks: dairy for kids and first coffee of the day, then almond for the wife (), soy (sweetened with apple juice) for me, and finally coconut for our smoothies.

[Swervin_Mervin]

The semi-skimmed water substitute insults me.

Blue/ gold or get out.

Dave!

I've always been a full fat milk drinker, but since we switched to delivered glass bottled milk, even the wife now barely ever touches semi-skimmed. She only uses it for tea now. FF better for you as well.

[Mito Man]

I thought about trying nut butter but I produced so much of it myself during the heatwave that I’ve frankly had enough of it.

[Richard]

HOT TAKE

Soy milk is better than cows milk and oat milk is better than either.

Pfffft

Cashew is the non-dairy milk of ultimate correctness

[tim]

This thread has gone weird.

[ste]

Cow's milk is really fucked up stuff. It's also pretty much the cruelest industry in the whole mass food system.

The Oatly Barista stuff is amazing. Loads of options though for other uses, some of the almond and coconut ones are great too.

[ste]

I saw vegan eggs in Wholefoods a while ago, it was a genuine egg carton so I reckoned they had actually gone through the effort of making a vegan egg white and yolk and putting it in a calcium shell casing. Opened the bloody box up out of curiosity and it was a sachet of powdered crap!

I don't think any of the vegan egg substitutes really work. There are other things you can use within recipes, for cakes etc but if you want to eat a 'fake egg' there isn't really anything out there.

We keep chickens, so I still eat their eggs at home. I just avoid eggs when I'm out.

[dan]

I saw vegan eggs in Wholefoods a while ago, it was a genuine egg carton so I reckoned they had actually gone through the effort of making a vegan egg white and yolk and putting it in a calcium shell casing. Opened the bloody box up out of curiosity and it was a sachet of powdered crap!

I don't think any of the vegan egg substitutes really work. There are other things you can use within recipes, for cakes etc but if you want to eat a 'fake egg' there isn't really anything out there.

We keep chickens, so I still eat their eggs at home. I just avoid eggs when I'm out.

No egg in your coffee next time: check.

[mik]

This thread has gone weird.

I now prefer weird made from quinoa.

[Rich B]

This thread has gone weird.

I now prefer weird made from quinoa.

my wife gets sick from weird quinoa. So she prefers non weird quinoa.

[mik]

This thread has gone weird.

I now prefer weird made from quinoa.

my wife gets sick from weird quinoa. So she prefers non weird quinoa.

She doesn’t prefer it, she is it. Or something.

[Rich B]

I now prefer weird made from quinoa.

my wife gets sick from weird quinoa. So she prefers non weird quinoa.

She doesn’t prefer it, she is it. Or something.

i couldn’t not agree more or less.

[Mito Man]

I prefer keen-wah.