Idiotic tenants

V8Granite
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by V8Granite »

Ghee ?

We get it at work, it’s like rubber !!!

Dave!
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Sundayjumper
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Sundayjumper »

In the current climate I thought it might be “problematic” to specify what they’d been cooking ;) It wasn’t beans on toast.

Which reminds me, when I was at Uni I shared a kitchen with a couple of Malaysian guys. No problem except for one occasion, it must have been a special occasion of some kind, but I went into the kitchen and they had a HUGE pan on the hob that took up all four rings, and were boiling a load of fish heads. The smell was quite something. Thankfully that was a one-off.

(the rest of the time they were very good neighbours, they studied all the time and being Muslim did not go out and get wasted, or play loud rock music, or have drunken parties in the kitchen)

(unlike some other people)

(ahem)

(oh, and my tenants weren’t Malaysian, FWIW)
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Mito Man
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Mito Man »

I remember when someone cooked salted cod at uni once - it smelled like super concentrated piss for a good week!
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Simon
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Simon »

Rich B wrote: Sat Jun 13, 2020 12:20 pm When we bought our current house it fucking stank of dog (yet somehow didn’t when we viewed it a month or two earlier?) We opened the front door and my Mrs just started crying because it was so bad (and she was pregnant!).

I ended up ripping up all the carpets that day and using white vinegar and bicarbonate soda on all the floor boards. it took a few rounds for the smell to go - it was literally soaked into the wood.
We did exactly the same with the last house we bought. But luckily we knew it was like that and we had an overlap with the rental we were in at the time so I literally picked up the keys went round then ripped up the carpets. They all went to the tip by the end of the first day.
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Zonda_
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Zonda_ »

Jobbo wrote: Fri Jun 12, 2020 11:44 am
Swervin_Mervin wrote: Fri Jun 12, 2020 10:42 am They stink and leave dog hair everywhere I'd the issue I'd imagine
That's the well-behaved ones with responsible owners. Even then, letting them piss on the lawn causes brown patches which don't re-grow.
Only the bitches kill grass, you’ll have to review your wording! :D
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jamcg
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by jamcg »

Dunno, Alfie does a good job of leaving patches on our lawn- well the bits he hasn’t tried to dig up yet 😂
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Carlos
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Carlos »

Sundayjumper wrote: Sat Jun 13, 2020 4:54 pm I never rented to anyone with pets (AFAIK !), but several with children and they were never a problem either.
We had a young couple with three young kids move into a 3 bed terrace 7 years ago. The family continued to expand until they had their 7th last year at which point we told them they needed to leave for their own kids welfare. The house was so manic and full of family crap my wife would check smoke alarms and have a quick look around on her inspections and get out.

They managed to find a 5 bed house to move into January this year and although they spent a week clearing and cleaning the condition of the house was hilarious. Everything was worn out, every carpet was threadbare (new when they moved in), a runner in the hallway covered laminate flooring that had worn through, not just the surface finish, all the way through (that was also new), only 1 ring on the hob worked, most of the door handles or latches had failed and how you wear skirting boards out i don't know :lol: :lol:

The only one who trumped that was a heroin addict :lol:
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Zonda_
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Zonda_ »

jamcg wrote: Sat Jun 13, 2020 8:02 pm Dunno, Alfie does a good job of leaving patches on our lawn- well the bits he hasn’t tried to dig up yet 😂
We've had loads of dogs and bitches and it's only ever been the bitches that kill the grass.
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Sundayjumper
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Sundayjumper »

Carlos - that’s not a problem with kids per se, it falls under the “bad tenants are bad” heading !
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Carlos
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Carlos »

Sundayjumper wrote: Sat Jun 13, 2020 8:29 pm Carlos - that’s not a problem with kids per se, it falls under the “bad tenants are bad” heading !
7 kids cause a great deal of wear and tear though which ultimately it was rather than abuse/damage.

We felt sorry for them until we found a chest freezer in the shed full of rancid food in April.
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Orange Cola
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Orange Cola »

That reminds me, we once let the flat out to some Aussies. They kept the curtains shut all day, kept the windows closed and ate fish most nights. That took some cleaning.
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Sundayjumper
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Sundayjumper »

Carlos wrote: Sat Jun 13, 2020 8:38 pm
Sundayjumper wrote: Sat Jun 13, 2020 8:29 pm Carlos - that’s not a problem with kids per se, it falls under the “bad tenants are bad” heading !
7 kids cause a great deal of wear and tear though which ultimately it was rather than abuse/damage.
But.... skirting boards ???? And seven kids isn’t just bad luck. It’s some fundamental lack of understanding somewhere (either where babies come from, or how many people should be living in a 3-bed house)


Edit - although having said that, seven years with no void period, I’d cut them some slack. You’ve done OK from it.
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Jobbo
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Jobbo »

Gav, I should change the ad to ‘No dogs or bitches’, then? 😃
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Jimmy Choo
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Jimmy Choo »

Jobbo wrote: Sun Jun 14, 2020 5:05 pm Gav, I should change the ad to ‘No dogs or bitches’, then? 😃
I tend to insist the bitches use one of the inside toilets. The dog is a female chihuahua so only leaks a couple of teaspoons on the grass.

When I first came to look at my current house, I met the previous viewer, who was a very attractive lady with many interesting facial tattoos. The subsequent viewer seemed a little slack jawed. I was open and upfront with the landlord. I told him I was divorcing. I told him my custody arrangements with the kids and asked about the Leopard Geckos. I asked about the Chihuahua that I've got part time custody of. We talked about our respective histories as landlords. I think as with most things, it comes down to "don't be a dick". If he had said "Nah. No exceptions." I'd have said thanks and gone somewhere else but he had the chance to check me out and make a judgement call.

Jobbo's weirdo just managed to self exclude himself.
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Beany
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Beany »

Jobbo wrote: Sun Jun 14, 2020 5:05 pm Gav, I should change the ad to ‘No dogs or bitches’, then? 😃
Remember, Clarence Boddicker had the right idea.

"Bitches, leave"
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dinny_g
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by dinny_g »

My brother did an Landlord inspection of his rental place which had a Very Strict No Smoking Policy...

When he arrived, there was an Ash Tray on the coffee table with lit cigarettes still burning. He went ballistic and the tenants actually tried the line "You said We couldn't smoke in the house - these cigarettes are being smoked by our guests".

They were the kids of a very wealthy Japanese business man, studying in London. Daddy paid the years rent in advance, Ferrari 360 in the garage etc. The place was constantly filthy, never cleaned etc. He reckons they must lived a privileged lifestyle back home and never had to clean up after themselves.

Final straw came on a subsequent visit when there was no smoking but they have put a Dart Board up on the wall in the living room (No back board etc) , 2 ceiling light units ripped out but still in use, a cracked toilet bowl and a bedroom door off the hinges. They were gone but it still took 6 weeks to get them out.

the security deposit didn't come near repairing the damage.
JLv3.0 wrote: Thu Jun 21, 2018 4:26 pm I say this rarely Dave, but listen to Dinny because he's right.
Rich B wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 1:57 pm but Dinny was right…
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Zonda_
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Zonda_ »

Jobbo wrote: Sun Jun 14, 2020 5:05 pm Gav, I should change the ad to ‘No dogs or bitches’, then? 😃
Exactly!
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Jobbo
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Re: Idiotic tenants

Post by Jobbo »

Had another failure tenant contact me this week. She is moving back from the US so wanted to just pay me 6 months' rent up front. I don't think taking a tenancy without viewing is a good idea so she found an old friend to come and look at it. When I spoke to him and asked where he was coming from, he told me (somewhere in Wiltshire) so I said it was a bit further than I'd have to travel... while chatting I realised he thought he was 7 miles away, so I queried whether he had looked at the map. No, apparently she thought the place was in Wiltshire in a small village of the same name. Turned out she hadn't looked at the map, or the address stating 'Warwickshire'.

Location, location, location... :lol:
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