Mardy teenagers

[NotoriousREV]

Teenage son: “I want to earn some money, can I do some of the chores around the house for cash?”

Me: “Sure, here’s a list of stuff. Do these each week and I’ll pay you £10” (About an hour a week’s worth of stuff)

Teen: “OK, cool. Thanks Dad”

*One week later*

Number of chores done by teenager: 0

Teen: “Can I have my money?”

Me: “No, you haven’t done the work we agreed”

Teen: “But the list of stuff you’ve given me to do is unreasonable. I’d rather not do it for what you’re paying me”

Me: “OK. Saves me £10 a week”

Teen: “I guess I’ll go back to asking you to buy me stuff instead of spending my own money”

Me: *Looks to camera with a wry smile*

[Carlos]

I could do with a vent on this subject as regards my 14yr old daughter but I'm in the pub hiding from her

Parenting sucks.

[NotoriousREV]

Mine’s generally easy going but can be an argumentative little twat and is a lazy fucker. I think he must get it from his mum.

[Jobbo]

I’ve just taken my 17yr old stepdaughter out to a kebab van. It’s such a delight to find one who isn’t (too) mardy.

[mik]

Mine’s generally easy going but can be an argumentative little twat and is a lazy fucker. I think he must get it from his mum.

[Simon]

Mine’s generally easy going but can be an argumentative little twat and is a lazy fucker. I think he must get it from his mum.

[Orange Cola]

A friend has three kids, the two eldest are in their teens. He said there comes a point in their life where a switch is flicked and suddenly the parents are viewed as being completely evil, nothing on this earth can be said or done to change the teenagers mind

[NotoriousREV]

We spent the entirety of the 2nd day of F1 testing arguing over how effective Racing Point will be at upgrading the 2020 car throughout the season. He says that because they copied Mercedes, they won’t know what they’re doing and so they won’t be able to make it any better than it is right now. I tried to explain that they didn’t just slap a copied design on there and hope for the best.

He’s just salty because he loves McLaren and doesn’t want Racing Point (who he hates) being too competitive

[Mito Man]

We spent the entirety of the 2nd day of F1 testing arguing over how effective Racing Point will be at upgrading the 2020 car throughout the season. He says that because they copied Mercedes, they won’t know what they’re doing and so they won’t be able to make it any better than it is right now. I tried to explain that they didn’t just slap a copied design on there and hope for the best.

He’s just salty because he loves McLaren and doesn’t want Racing Point (who he hates) being too competitive

But look at Haas

[NotoriousREV]

He likes to use Haas as his example

[Rich B]

At least you can be certain he’s yours!!

[evostick]

Had a phone call at 2.30am last night from a random stranger. He'd found my eldest (18) collapsed on the side of the road and had managed to open his phone and call me.

Turns out my son had been ejected from a nightclub for being pissed (he'd fallen over). He then tried to get back in in order to get his insulin which was back with his friends but the bouncers had refused to believe his story about being diabetic and had told him to fuck off

He was of course unable to administer the insulin necessary to cope with all the booze they'd just sold him and by the time I got there he was in a right mess. Thought I was someone trying to fight him ffs.

Daughter is 17 this year. Found her a very clean Mazda2, which for some reason was what she wanted, and then she threw a wobbly about it being bright green

I spend most of my spare time with the 7 year old and will continue to do so until he turns into a teenager.

[V8Granite]

My eldest sprints and shouts Daddy whenever I pick him up from school. He comes for a cuddle every morning and we ride bikes and play RC cars. He is far too clever for his age but is generally a lovely young boy and tries hard. He is also doing very well at school and is excelling at Tan Su Do.

My youngest gives me lots of cuddles, is freakishly strong for a 4 year old, will play trains with me for hours and is quite happy doing his own thing. Ridiculously pleasant.

This will last forever.

Or when they hit 13 I’ll have to be restrained from hitting the mardy argumentative little pricks.

No, it will last forever.

Dave!

At least the dog will always like me.

[Carlos]

My eldest was bright, articulate and a pleasure to be around until she hit 14 last year. She's turned into a grunting awkward monster.

Her school work has been really poor this year which i could accept but for her teachers telling us and her that the main issues are attitude and a disruptive circle of friends she's recently attached herself to.

2 months ago one of her group bought a proper tattoo kit online and tatooed her and at least 10 others who are now all on a Hepatitis anti viral course.

The same group went to an under 18s disco 2 weeks ago and I collected her at 7.40pm pissed as fart, a full 40 minutes after being dropped off.

And don't get me started on the hours she'll spend in a bathroom to avoid an event or occasion she doesn't want to go to.

As others have said, at least the dogs are a constant.

[NotoriousREV]

I’m glad I don’t have daughters, to be honest. Lads are easy to figure out.

My mate’s 14 year old daughter and all of her friends decided they were all non-binary and pansexual. When she announced this at home, she got in a major huff at the lack of reaction. Apparently “ok, love, good for you” wasn’t what she’d hoped for The whole thing died a death after about 6 weeks and she regretted having her hair cut short.

[Carlos]

Lads are easy to figure out.

It seems so, my 13 yr old son by his sister's standard is no bother at all.

[tim]

I got 3 of the buggers. Girls, that is. #prayforme

[V8Granite]

I think if I had a daughter I’d be far too molly coddling and eventually they would turn on me and I’d have to fight the urge to kill anyone who touches her.

I fully expect at some point in my life to give a man punch to one of my sons but I hope not. My Dad gave one to me and that is the reason I managed to get my apprenticeship. To be fair, I deserved it

I like the reply on the non binary daughter

Dave!

[nuttinnew]

At least the dog

[duncs500]

He is far too clever for his age

90% of people's kids are above average intelligence.